


The Spy

by somekindofwildgirl



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe, Badass, Dark Past, F/M, Mission Fic, Post Hogwarts AU, Post-War, Redeemed Draco Malfoy, Spies & Secret Agents, Unspeakable Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy, Unspeakable Partners
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-03
Updated: 2017-07-10
Packaged: 2018-09-06 03:48:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 40,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8733643
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/somekindofwildgirl/pseuds/somekindofwildgirl
Summary: Hermione Granger is sent undercover to dismantle a new generation of Death Eaters. What she doesn't count on is having Malfoy as her partner.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> If you followed me here from Amortentia, then welcome back! If you're new to my stories, welcome :). The Spy is inspired by Marvel, with a HP twist. I also haven't written a story in the first person in forever, so please give me feedback!

**Saturday, April 8, 2000 4:15 pm**

"Unspeakable 3, in the office now!"

Dropping my quill, I hurried to the office. It wasn't the tone that sent me running, although that would have made the rookies piss their pants. This was the excuse that I needed to get out of an engagement tonight. I wanted to seize the opportunity of a new assignment before my boss changed his mind and gave it to someone else. He was known to do that from time to time.

"Yes, sir?" I asked, stepping into the sparse office. No pictures, awards, nor personal touches were added the room. There was nothing to hint at the kind of man that my boss was. This was the ideal way to live. No one could gauge his weakness or manipulate him, because he did not give his opponents any material to use. The only thing out of place was the mess of files on his desk in an otherwise neat office.

"Take a seat," he said, tossing a file on his desk. "How have your assignments panned out so far?"

"All successful, sir."

The Head Unspeakable frowned. "And your sessions with the psychologist?"

"Ongoing, sir."

"And your medical exams?"

"I have been cleared for duty, sir."

The Head Unspeakable rummaged around the messy pile before grabbing another ivory file. "Perfect. I have a mission for you. It requires your specific skill set and it is a matter of national security."

I leaned in. This was exactly what I needed. The last few assignments that I received had been easy, too easy. I knew it was the psychologist's fault. She seemed to think I needed time to process, that I was not coping healthily. "What is the mission, sir?"

"Are you certain you are ready for an assignment of this caliber? This will require undercover work and there is no telling how long you will be away."

"I am, sir."

He smiled. "Perfect. I expect you here at oh-seven-hundred for the debrief."

The Head Unspeakable handed me the heavy folder, at least two inches thick of paper, and I returned to my cubicle. The others watched me warily, but did not approach me. Thankfully. I opened the beige file and started pouring over the documents.

_The Death Eaters shall be reborn. The Dark Lord will rise again._

The words sent shivers down my spine and I was engrossed in the details of mission. It would be difficult, but it was just what I needed to take my mind off everything.

The next time I glanced up, I was alone in the office. The sun had set hours ago. Grabbing my things, I left the office and took the floo home.

The invitation was left on my desk.

 _Introducing the future Mr. & Mrs. Potter_  
_Please join us for an engagement party_  
_honoring Harry and Ginny_  
_on Saturday, April 8 at 6 pm._

* * *

 **Sunday, April 9,** **2000, 6:58 am**

"Unspeakable 3, take a seat. I will be your handler for this case. Now, contrary to what you were led to believe, this is not a solo mission. You will be infiltrating the radical group with Unspeakable 2."

I chose the seat closest to the door, with my back to the wall. It was an optimal position in case of an attack. I had a good visual of both the door and the windows. The other hooded figure - I assumed Unspeakable 2 - also sat in a similar position. I took a moment to assess him.

He was taller than me, probably 6'2. He was toned, but there was a hidden strength there. Unspeakable 2 was highly trained. It was obvious in the way he held himself, the way he moved, and the way he assessed me in a similar manner. My odds of winning a physical fight with him were 50/50. I would have to determine his magical ability at a further date.

"Are you two done inspecting each other, or should I leave the room?" our Handler said drily. We both straightened up at the chastisement. "Thank you. You will both be undercover, posing as a married couple. Edward and Lyra Harrington. Edward owns a company and they have recently expanded into London. You are both from old families that went abroad to Canada and word has spread about your arrival."

"What is the objective?" I asked.

"To take down this radical operation before they wreak havoc. It is a tentative time in our world. We need to protect this peace at all cost, while our society is healing."

"When do we start?" Unspeakable 2 asked. There was something familiar about his voice. I knew him. It wasn't uncommon. We were required to wear cloaks in the office. The fewer people that knew our identities, the better. If one of us was captured, we would not be able to divulge our colleagues.

Our handler gave us each a stack of documents. "You have one week of preparation before you begin. You will meet at the enclosed location in seven days at oh-three-hundred. You will have four hours to make sure your story is solid and then your mission begins. Any questions?"

We both shook our heads and were dismissed.

* * *

**Sunday, April 9, 2000, 7:00 pm**

Someone was in my apartment. Pulling out my wand, I scanned the area and pinpointed the intruder in the living room. I carefully made my way there, watching out for any sudden attacks. Most people would be terrified to find someone in their home, but I was thrilled. My adrenaline had kicked in sending my senses into overdrive. I was ready for a fight.

I rounded the corner and threw myself at the stranger, landing gracefully on my knees with him in a chokehold. "What are you doing here? What do you want?"

"Her-Hermione it-it's me-me. H-H-Harry," he managed to rasp out.

I recognized the jet-black hair and lightning bolt scar and immediately released my friend. "Shit, Harry. What the hell do you think you're doing? I could have killed you."

"I realize now that I was an idiot for surprising you, but I didn't know how else to reach you. You keep ignoring our owls. You missed my engagement party, Hermione," he said, rubbing his throat.

I ignored him. Of course, I knew I missed it. But it was easier this way, better for everyone involved if I didn't show up. I walked to the kitchen and got myself a glass of water. Harry followed me - it was like he couldn't get a hint - and I reluctantly poured a glass for him as well.

"Everyone missed you. Ginny ended up making Fleur her maid of honor since you refused the position. She hasn't said anything, but I know the wedding planning has stressed her out," Harry said as I rummaged around the kitchen for food. "My boss told me that I'm next in line for his job when he retires. Can you imagine it? Head Auror?"

I grabbed a can of tuna and started eating. I was starving, but I would have my full dinner later. If I had it now, Harry would invite himself and I would have to tolerate his presence longer. Even now he was droning on about something I could care less about.

As much as Harry claimed differently, I know that Ginny, Ron, and the others were relieved by my absence. It made things easier. They don't talk about it. The time that I went rogue during the war. To be honest, I barely remember it. All I know is that I was _recalibrated_. The Death Eaters somehow found a way to take Hermione Granger out and replace her with something else, _someone else_. One minute I was me, and the next, I wasn't.

Harry brought me back somehow. That part is fuzzy, but I have never been the same since my capture. Even though they try to ignore the truth, that I will never be the Hermione Granger they remember. I deal with their disappointment with every encounter.

Mrs. Weasley gives me a pitying look when she thinks that I am not looking. Harry and Ron try to joke around, but their laughter is always halted when they realize that I haven't joined in. They try to include me by sending me invitations to their major events. It is the way they try to ease their conscience. They can tell themselves that they tried and I was the one that refused to reach out.

My best friends were moving on with their lives, while I was clinging to the fringes of society, fighting off dangers they would never know had threatened them.

Hermione Granger died in the war and it was time the world got used to it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to my friend Twilight for reading over Chapter 1 and 2.

**Saturday, September 27, 1997, 7:00 pm**

Hermione made her way to the Headmaster's office. Hogwarts was no longer operating as a school. Everyone thought that it was closed, but a secret rebellion was brewing at the heart of the sacred castle. The war had stolen their childhoods and many children would never experience their First Year at Hogwarts.

"Sugar Quills."

The gargoyle roared to life and Hermione made her way up the winding staircase. To say she was nervous was an understatement. Hermione had successfully completed her missions for the Order of the Phoenix. Typically, Remus was the one that gave her the commands. Only those with more serious missions and responsibilities had the honor of seeing the Headmaster (although he was no longer a Headmaster, habits were hard to break).

"Ah, Miss Granger. Take a seat," Professor Dumbledore said. "I suspect that you know the reason that you have been summoned. I would like to formally promote you to Lead Researcher, if that is a path you are interested in."

"Of course, sir."

"Perfect. I look forward to seeing you flourish in such an important role," he said with a twinkle in his eyes. He dismissed her and Hermione practically floated down the stairs.

She had been working her ass off for this promotion. Being the Lead Researcher meant that she could delegate minor research topics and focus on those of high importance for the Order. She would gather a list of known Death Eaters, their most commonly used curses and potions. She could find out each Death Eater's weakness and develop counter-curses and antidotes.

Hermione now had the power to change the tide of the war.

* * *

**Sunday, April 16, 2000, 3:25 am**

I made my way to the rendezvous point. It was still dark outside, which made it easier to move around. I don't know why people feared the night. My experience showed that most monsters operated in the daylight. The politicians, businessmen, corporations, to name a few. I lost track of how many I had helped take down.

Although I worked for the Ministry, only the Minister for Magic knew what we were doing. And even he had limited access in case one of our missions did not go according to plan. The Minister could deny knowing anything about it.

Scanning my surroundings and knowing I was in the clear, I slipped into the building. It was an old building, almost falling apart. I took the stairs up as I took note of the places of entry and exit. I reached 203, pulled out my wand and opened the door. I gently shut it, keeping my back to the door, and looked around the sparse apartment. I took a step into the room when I was attacked.

The person threw me to the ground, but I grabbed a hold of their arm and took them down with me. We tussled on the ground and it wasn't until I managed to pin him down that I saw my attacker.

"Malfoy? What are you doing here?" I asked. We were both panting. I knew I would not have maintained the advantage for long, but he had stopped his assault.

His grey eyes were warm for a second, before turning cold. He pushed me off him. "The mission, just like you are. I should have realized you were Unspeakable 3, Granger."

"Do you make a habit of attacking your partners?" I snapped, standing up and brushing the dust off my clothes.

"Only ones that are thirty minutes late. I thought you had been compromised. We were supposed to meet at oh-three-hundred."

I rolled my eyes and grabbed a small box from my pocket. I enlarged it to reveal a large trunk. "My plans were altered. I was told to pick this up at oh-three-hundred, then meet you here."

Malfoy opened the trunk and took inventory. I had done the same upon receiving the trunk. Our identities were within. The clothes our aliases were expected to wear, the potions that would change our appearances, and discrete weapons we could use. He pulled out the things he would need and started going through them. I copied him.

Lyra Harrington. She was blonde with green eyes, straight hair, and a heart shaped face. She was a twenty-one year old, newly married to Edward, and enjoyed painting. Lyra dressed in beautiful, but simple clothes. I looked over her documents and went over her birthdate, place of birth, and where she lived. I was given this information in the debrief, but it was always different holding the documents. It made it all real.

Malfoy was still looking over his stuff. It was already 0400 and we needed to get some things cleared up. "We met at a party."

"I know, it says all of this in the debrief," Malfoy said setting his documents down. "We met at a function that my father threw. It was to celebrate my promotion as his right-hand man."

I grabbed the wooden stool and placed it in front of him. I took a seat and gently grabbed his hand, inspecting it. "My mother was trying to set me up with a healer named Larry. He was dreadfully boring. You came to my rescue, asking me to dance."

"What is the point of all this," Malfoy said, pulling his hand away.

"The point is to not get killed. The sooner that we are comfortable around each other, physically, the better. We are supposed to be married, happy newlyweds. It is the details that will keep us alive," I said, dropping all pretenses of being friendly. But I continued. It didn't matter that Malfoy and I had a bad history at Hogwarts or that we had fought on opposite sides during the war. He was my partner and not trusting him meant certain death. "You asked me to dance and you complimented me on my purple dress. You were intelligent, handsome, and I knew then that you would be trouble."

"I was seeing someone else at the time, but there was something about you. I asked you to dinner three nights later," Malfoy continued.

This continued back and forth for the rest of our allotted preparation time. Malfoy became more comfortable with the little touches, but it wasn't until we were about to leave that he caught me off guard. We both stood up and I was about to grab the trunk when he kissed me. It was uncomfortable, but at the same time, it wasn't. There was something familiar and comforting about his kiss. Which didn't make any sense. Back at Hogwarts, we never would have kissed each other. We were enemies.

"It's oh-seven-hundred," I said, pulling away from him. I went to my things. "What was that for?"

"I didn't want our first kiss in public to be awkward. You were right. We are newlyweds and we have to sell it."

I didn't answer. I started getting dressed in Lyra's clothes. I grabbed the provided purse and put the necessary documents within. I left the potion for last. It tasted awful, but thankfully, we only had to take it weekly. It wasn't polyjuice, but a variation of it. My facial features would change, but my body would remain the same. The reason behind it was so that our physical training wasn't lost when we transformed. Pinching my nose, I knocked it back and felt that familiar tingle under my skin.

We were ready to go.

* * *

**Sunday, April 16, 2000, 6:00 pm**

"Did you have a good day at work, honey?" I asked once our food had arrived. I had ordered a tuna salad, while Malfoy ordered steak and potatoes.

Malfoy grabbed my free hand and started eating his potatoes. "I think I found a shop today. It is right on Diagon Alley, but is far enough away from the apothecary to avoid competition. The rent is a little more expensive, but I think the location will pay off."

"How much is the rent?"

"Now before you say no, I think you should come and take a look first," he said with a smile. "How is your food?"

"The tuna's a little dry, but what else is to be expected from a place like this?" I said with a frown. The food was actually amazing and I had to force myself to eat it slowly. I used other women at the restaurant as a guide for my behavior.

A couple appeared at our table. "Darling, I have always commented that the seafood here is dry," the woman said, leaning against the man. "Are you the Harringtons?"

Leonard and Annabelle Rosier. I recognized them from the debrief. They were younger than Malfoy and I. Leonard Rosier had gone to Durmstrang, but I was certain that Malfoy was acquainted with him.

My fake husband was glaring at Leonard. I drew circles on his hand so that he could calm down before the couple noticed his hostility. I looked them over and found them to be innocent enough. The man was slightly shorter than Malfoy and twice his weight. If I had to guess, he worked a desk job. But there was a level of intelligence to his brown eyes that I knew we needed to be wary of. The woman was petite, with long brown hair, and expensive, tacky clothes.

"We are," I said with a smile. "And you are?"

"Merlin, where have my manners gone?" she giggled. "Annabelle Rosier, and my husband Leonard."

Malfoy stuck out his hand. "It is nice to make your acquaintance."

"I hear that you are new to the city. I don't know if you know this, but my aunt is your father's second cousin. She told us that you were coming and that we were to welcome you," Leonard Rosier said. He looked like he couldn't care less that he was related to the Harringtons, but protocol was everything in the elite circles. "Are you free this Friday?"

"We should check our schedules," I said with a smile. "How can I get ahold of you?"

"By owl, of course. I hope you can make it, we are throwing a party and inviting our closest friends. It would be the easiest way for you to talk to the proper people here in London," Annabelle said. The underlying threat was not missed. I knew that these people weren't in the radical group, but maybe those in attendance might be.

"We would be delighted and will let you know if we can make it," Malfoy said, firmly.

The couple shook our hands again before disappearing. It seemed like we managed to keep our cover as a married couple intact. I wanted to chastise Malfoy for almost losing his cool, but this was not the place to do so.

"The people here are so friendly," I said before digging into my salad.

Malfoy shrugged. "They didn't seem like the sharpest tools in the box, but I suppose they were nice."

After our dinner, I ordered a piece of chocolate cake. I knew that Malfoy was not fond of chocolate and I took delight in feeding it to him as a loving wife would. I got up and made him move to make room for me. He looked uncertain and it was something that I was going to have to work on with him. If anyone was watching closely, he would give us away.

I did what I did best and I took control of the situation. I kissed him. I had prepared for him pulling away by sneaking one of my hands behind his head and keeping it in place. It was not romantic for us by any means, but I was certain that it would look genuine and loving to outsiders.

"What was that for?" Malfoy asked, his brow furrowed.

I smiled, lovingly. "I am so grateful to have found you. I couldn't ask for a better husband."

"I'm the lucky one," Malfoy said, leaning in and giving me a chaste kiss.

He was starting to learn the game. I wondered how many undercover missions he had gone on, because he was acting like a rookie. Men were typically trained as soldiers first, spies second, and women were only trained as spies. It was a delicate game, one that if lost, would cost your life. But Malfoy was growing more comfortable as the dinner went on and I was certain that only the most observant would be able to sniff us out as fakes.

* * *

**Wednesday, April 19, 2000, 2:30 am**

I woke up, drenched in sweat, and barely able to catch my breath. I sat up, alarmed, and it took me a second to place my location. When I did, I collapsed back into bed. Another nightmare. The more often I saw the psychologist at Headquarters, the more the bad dreams haunted me. Tonight, it was full of blood, screams, and a shock of white blonde hair. I didn't know what it meant. I never did. I turned to see if Malfoy had woken up, only to find him gone.

Part of me was grateful that he wasn't here. The Malfoy I remembered from school would have seized the opportunity to call me weak. But his side of the bed was cold and I wondered if he was also plagued with nightmares. It was common in our line of work after all. Deciding not to fret about it, I got up and grabbed workout clothes. The only thing that made me feel better was running.

I got ready and set out for my morning run.

* * *

**Wednesday, December 24, 1997, 11:00 pm**

Harry, Ron, and Hermione oversaw the operation. Harry was leading the group that would break into the hideout. Ron would enter the backway, and Hermione was backup. They each had their soldiers. It was an easy assignment, which was why the Golden Trio were in charge. The senior Order members were carrying out their own classified missions tonight.

Hermione watched as the two teams entered the hideout. The building had been monitored for the past week and was confirmed to house dangerous Death Eaters. She was worried about Harry and Ron, but Professor Dumbledore would not have given them this mission if it wasn't something they could handle. All she could think was that this was a terrible way to spend Christmas Eve. The boys both entered the establishment, but there was no sign of a fight. That was strange. But, maybe the Death Eaters were in the basement.

She felt her thoughts drift. What would her parents be doing tonight? Did they feel like something was missing from their holiday traditions? What was Australia like this time of year?

Both Harry and Ron's group burst out of the headquarters. There were no signs of Death Eaters. They were supposed to be here. What was going on?

"It's a trap!" Harry yelled.

Ron started running towards her. "Hermione! Behind you!"

A chill ran down her spine. She turned around to see a white mask and a black cloak. Before she could do anything, the Death Eater grabbed her and she felt the familiar sensation of apparition.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I ended up doing three rewrites of this chapter and spent over 20 hours on it. I hope you enjoy it!

**Monday, April 18, 2000, 10:30 am**

"You're going to get us killed."

"And good morning to you too," he said.

This was the first time I had seen Malfoy since dinner yesterday and we needed to talk about his performance, or lack of. I walked to the laundry room and peeled off my running clothes. My legs were burning in just the right way and I felt the familiar post-run calm envelop me. Putting on a clean outfit, I returned to the kitchen. I was frustrated that I needed to babysit him in the field. My former partners all knew how to handle themselves, so why did the Ministry send me a rookie? He didn't answer me and instead, kept eating his breakfast.

"You're just going to ignore me?" I asked, pulling out my own breakfast of fruit and Greek yogurt. Even now he chose to read through the paper instead of acknowledging me. Rolling my eyes, I started to search through the cupboards. I needed caffeine if I was going to be productive today.

"The shelf next to the window," Malfoy said and it killed me inside that he was right. "And you didn't give me constructive criticism, you made a statement and then insulted me."

I set the coffee tin down on the counter and turned to face him. "Okay, fine. Let me rephrase that. What is your history with Leonard Rosier?"

"I never said we had a history."

"You're new to the undercover sector, so let me tell you a few things that will save your life if you bother to listen," I said with a cold smile. "You trust your partner with everything and anything that is relevant to the mission. We need to have plans, backup plans, and a working knowledge of what you're comfortable doing. If you freeze, then we're both dead. It is glaringly obvious that you are not comfortable with me. That changes today."

It was clear that Malfoy had no idea who he was dealing with. If he knew half of the missions that I had been on, the things I had done to survive... He would be taking notes. But he was actually listening and watched me with an undecipherable expression. What was his skill set? Why was he assigned to this case?

"Rosier got the woman that I loved killed in the War," Malfoy said, standing up and gathering his dishes. The smell of eggs and bacon still hung in the air. My stomach growled as I looked at my uneaten breakfast. "If I had known that you were going to be my partner, I would not have taken the mission."

I grabbed my breakfast and took a seat, the coffee tin forgotten. I tried to pretend that his words didn't affect me. Malfoy hurt my pride. I was the best spy in the country. He should be honored to work with me. Malfoy was a reminder that I worked better alone. But it was too late to request going in solo. We were forced to see this assignment out until the end. He had finished cleaning up the kitchen and was about to leave when I spoke up.

"Do you think it's easy for me to work with you?" I said, my voice slightly louder than a whisper. "It is not my job to like you. When I am out there, Hermione Granger ceases to exist. I am Lyra and you are my husband. I do what I need to do for the sake of the mission, and you should do the same. You will face people from your childhood and you should prepare for that."

Malfoy left the room without answering.

* * *

**Thursday, April 20, 2000, 6:30 am**

Malfoy and I stared at each other. We were both crouched – each ready to leap into action – but waiting for the other to make the first move. Fighting was like dancing, not that I had much experience with the latter. We looked for any weakness to exploit, but we were trained against such weaknesses. Things between us were still tense, but we managed to be professional. We circled each other until I lost my patience and attacked.

I threw myself at his legs, hoping to knock him to the ground. Malfoy caught me and threw me over his shoulder. I snaked my hands around his neck. When he threw me to the ground, I pulled him down with me. When we crashed to the ground, I tried to use the momentum to flip us over so that I was on top of him. He read my move and threw me on the ground. I punched his side, he kneed me in the stomach. This went on and on until he managed to overpower me, pinning me to the ground.

"I am impressed, Granger," Malfoy said, releasing me. He helped me up and I took his hand gratefully. "Who taught you?"

I didn't answer him at first. How was I supposed to when I didn't know myself? My memory of the war is patchy at best. Did I learn with Harry or with the Death Eaters? It was not a question I wanted to ask my best friend, so I left it alone. The only thing that mattered was that it was a useful skill to have. I grabbed my bottle, took a sip of water, and pulled on my sweater. This makeshift gym was going to be handy in the coming weeks. I looked up at Malfoy on my way out and noticed that he was still waiting for my answer.

"The War, obviously. Like you," I said, before disappearing to shower.

* * *

**Friday, April 21, 2000, 7:00 pm**

Our preparation this past week had been leading up to this night. The future of our mission hinged on this party. If we were accepted, then we would get invited to more events. But if we botched it, then our mission would be a failure.

I had never failed a mission and I wasn't about to start with this assignment.

The Rosiers had allowed us access to their floo. I was about to grab a handful of powder when Malfoy stopped me. "Look, you were right. I didn't know what I was getting into with this mission. Thank you for the advice," he said.

I nodded, grabbed the powder, and shouted my location. I knew I should have said something more. I had no doubt that he meant it on some level, but it was pre-mission jitters. Just because I had to rely on him, didn't mean I trusted him. I looked around the room. I was surprised that no one else was there, but maybe the other guests were taking other means of transportation. I could hear music and laughter trickle in from the hallway. My fake-husband arrived almost immediately after me. He offered his arm and we tried to figure out where to go.

"You would think he would greet us or at least arrange for a house elf to guide us," Malfoy said irritated.

I rubbed his arm to comfort him as a loving wife would. We both knew it was a great opportunity, or at least I hope Malfoy recognized that it was. We had free reign of the manor and the Rosiers had given us an excuse to investigate. My heart was pounding as we made our way through the dark hallways. I didn't know what to look for, how involved the Rosiers were. Would they even be trusted to have any relevant information? I pulled Draco behind a pillar at the sound of approaching footsteps.

"We need more time," a voice hissed. "If we move too quickly-"

"That is a luxury we don't have. One month. No more, no less."

The rest of the conversation was muffled. It felt like hours passed as they waited for the two men to leave. My heart was pounding in my chest so loudly that I was certain we would be caught. Malfoy's arms were wrapped around me as we tried to be as hidden as possible. Trying to perform a spell would be too risky. There was nothing to be done until the men left. Malfoy smelled nice, like pine, and it was comforting. It reminded me of- Well, I couldn't quite remember. But whatever memory lingered beneath the surface, it was reassuring.

The men started to walk back to the ballroom and I almost breathed a sigh of relief. We waited five full minutes after the men walked off before leaving our hiding spot. Malfoy opened his mouth to speak but I shook my head. We needed to get to the ballroom, now. He seemed to understand my urgency. Malfoy led me there quite easily. He later told me that all the manors had a similar layout, the same architect had designed them. This would have been useful to know last week.

The doors swung open to reveal that the party had been underway for some time. The band was three old men that looked like they were about to die at any moment. They played traditional music that would be more appropriate at a funeral. The guests were carefully sipping their champagne, talking on the sidelines. Malfoy looked unimpressed and I wondered what parties had been like during his childhood. It was a well-known fact that Malfoys were no longer allowed at pureblood engagements, a punishment for switching over to the Order's side towards the end of the war.

"You came!" Annabelle said as she threw her arms around us. It was very uncomfortable and the gesture drew looks, some amused and others pitying. I was grateful the moment she released us. "I have to introduce you to my friends."

I looked at Malfoy and he shrugged. He placed his hand on the small of my back, sending shivers down my spine. It was unnerving attending a party with so many of my former classmates. Only three years had passed, yet we had experienced a lifetime since Hogwarts. The War had left many scars, both physical and psychological. It was obvious in the hardened glances of twenty-year olds, the weariness in their movements. And a radical group was threatening to make us relive horror and terror all over again.

"Girls, these are relatives of Leonard. Edward and Lyra Harrington," Annabelle said when we reached the two girls that I had hoped to avoid. "Edward and Lyra, meet Pansy Parkinson and Daphne Nott."

I stepped towards the girls and offered my hand. "I am delighted to meet you."

Parkinson looked at me with a bored expression, while Nott-formerly-Greengrass took my offered hand and gave me a small smile. I was taken off guard by how much Parkinson had changed. She could have been quite beautiful, having grown into her pug-like features. But the effect was ruined by the dark makeup that painted her eyes, the way she laughed obnoxiously, and the slit that ran down the right side of her red dress. Daphne Nott was still her frosty, blonde self, looking quite prim and proper next to Parkinson.

"Enchanted," Nott said.

"If you'll excuse us, but we are needed," Parkinson said with a cold smile.

The two girls walked away. I saw Annabelle's shoulders slump, but her smile never wavered. She was wearing the latest fashion, but she had managed to pick a hideous dress. I could tell that she was trying hard to fit in with the 'in' crowd, but kept falling short. Her husband joined us and I kept a close eye on Malfoy. His expression never wavered and I was relieved that he had taken my advice to heart.

"Where were you?" Leonard asked us, confirming my suspicion. Their floo was being monitored. "Thirty minutes went by between your arrival and entrance."

"Leonard, really," Annabelle swatted his chest. "Please don't answer that. My husband is paranoid."

Malfoy wrapped his arm around me and pulled me closer. "I apologize for the delay. There was no house elf to greet us and I hadn't seen my wife all day."

"We forgot a greeter!" our hostess exclaimed, completely ignoring the second half of Malfoy's answer.

I leaned my head against Malfoy's chest and smiled, feeling bad for the girl. She was sweet and that's why the Slytherins were eating her alive. He rubbed light circles on my side and I wondered if that was intentional or not. Leonard was still looking at us suspiciously, but he seemed to be content with our answer. As much as I liked Annabelle, her and her husband were not the mission. They were a means to an end. Now, Parkinson and Nott on the other hand… I had a feeling that those were the people I needed to get close to.

"Would you mind if I danced with my wife?" Malfoy asked.

Annabelle giggled. "Of course not, have fun!"

My fake-husband led me to the dancefloor. There was only a handful of other couples dancing. The other guests were content to watch from the sidelines. This truly was an awful party. Malfoy gently grabbed me and led me through the steps. As we moved together, I looked around the room and tried to figure out a plan.

"Blaise and Theodore. They were the two that we heard earlier," Malfoy whispered in my ear before the dance separated us again. I kept my gaze on him, with a hint of a smile. He looked so different in his disguise. He had chocolate brown hair, blue eyes, and a strong jaw line. The way he looked at me, I could almost believe that we were in love. I was glad to see such an improvement.

"How do we approach them?"

He smirked, a look I had not seen on his face since we were children. "We don't. That will make us no better than the wannabes over there. If we act like we belong, they will come to us."

"How can you be sure?" I didn't want this to backfire. Even now I could see Parkinson, Nott, Nott, and Zabini standing together off to the side. That was where we needed to be, but it did not look like they would be receptive to new people.

"They looked to me growing up and I could have led them as an adult, but fate had another plan for me."

"You have a different last name and considerably less money this time around."

When the song drew to an end – and I realized we had danced for over twenty minutes – Malfoy held me for a moment before kissing my forehead. "Darling, my name and money had nothing to do with it back then."

His hand returned to the small of my back. We talked to a lot of people, but it was only Malfoy's former friends that fit the mold for this radical group. Malfoy was in the middle of talking to Flint when I excused myself. I needed a moment to breathe. My husband barely acknowledged my departure as I made my way to the washroom. I managed to find it and slipped inside.

The scar on my left arm was throbbing. It was this place and these people that had triggered it. The mark would never heal. There were times where the wound would be at the stage of almost being healed and other times, where it would flare up like the mark was fresh. The disguise only hid my scars. The Unspeakables had tried to find a way to cure the dark magic. It was in their best interest that we had no distinguishable marks, but nothing was found. At least, the scar was well hidden.

I was sweating profusely - a sign that I was nearing a panic attack - and I tried to focus on my breathing, running through the exercises the psychologist had recommended. When the feeling had passed, I glanced at the mirror and groaned at my reflection. My blonde hair clung to my face and my makeup had almost disappeared. I splashed cold water on my face and tried to clear my mind. I would be no good to the mission in this state. I didn't understand, I had never reacted this way on previous assignments. But there was something different about this one, something that I couldn't quite put my finger on. Whatever it was, it was changing all the rules.

I started performing spells that would fix my hair. I had brought travel sized makeup and started reapplying it. I repeated my mantra after I put my finishing touches. Hermione Granger was gone. I was Lyra Harrington and I had a husband waiting for me. Grabbing my purse, I left the bathroom. I didn't find my husband right away and was surprised when Parkinson joined me.

"It is dreadful that you are related to those two idiots."

"I'm not the only one that finds them hard to tolerate?"

"Merlin no!" Parkinson laughed, before hooking her arm around mine. "I had a good feeling about you. Everyone here is so stuffy."

"Is everyone in London like this?"

"Unfortunately most are. The only girl here that I can stand is Daphne and now that she is married, she is far less fun."

Malfoy's words rang in my head. The only way to get in with these people is to act like they should be honored to spend time with us. Every group I have infiltrated to date had their particularities. Parkinson and I walked to the nearest champagne table and each grabbed a full glass. She nodded approvingly before we each took a sip. I caught sight of my husband deep in conversation with Zabini and Nott. Daphne Nott was nowhere to be seen.

"Don't worry about those two, they're harmless," Parkinson said waving her hand dismissively. "How long have you been married?"

"Over a year," I said. I wanted to laugh at her observation. The two men were in league with the radicals. They were not harmless. But neither were Malfoy and me.

I spent the rest of the night with Parkinson. She was not the perfect pureblood that I remembered. The raven-haired witch swore, got drunk, and did not care what the others thought of her. Instead of repelling people, it drew them to her. I saw the way the men stared at her, the way the women found any excuse to talk to her. She was the woman every girl wanted to be and that every man wanted. And Pansy knew the effect she had, it was obvious in the way she moved and talked.

I was enjoying myself until something in my husband changed. I couldn't explain it. It could have been a change in posture, but whatever it was, I did not have a good feeling about it. We had to leave. I excused myself from Pansy who simply waved me away and I made my way to Malfoy. It felt like it took an eternity to reach him, time that he could have used to blow our cover. There was a look in his eye that I didn't like, that twisted my insides. But I wrapped my arms behind him.

"Excuse me gentlemen, but I am feeling rather unwell. Thank you for keeping him company."

I didn't wait for their response and forced Malfoy to the fireplace. I threw the floo powder in, yelled out our destination, and shoved him in. Once he disappeared, I grabbed my own handful of powder and followed him. I had barely appeared into our living room before he was shoving me against the wall.

"What is your problem?" I asked, my voice dripping with anger.

"Don't you dare emasculate me in front of them again. Why the hell did you force me here?"

When he made no move to release me, I grabbed the arm he was using to pin me down and pushed him off. Malfoy tried to grab me, but I threw him against the wall. He came at me again and again and I managed to fight him off. "What is your problem? You became a liability out there, so I removed you."

He stopped his assault, realized what he had done, and cradled his head in his hands as he sunk to the ground. "Sorry, Granger. I haven't had an episode since the War."

I saw him withdraw into himself and I cursed the Head Unspeakable for sending me such a rookie. I wanted to ask him about what his episodes consisted of, but I knew that right now wasn't the time. After warding our house against everyone except for us, I walked up to him, pushed his legs down and took a seat on his lap. I pulled his hands away from his face, but still, he refused to look at me. I grabbed his chin and forced him to look at me.

"Spying is difficult. You were good tonight, way better than you were at the dinner," I teased. "We all have our moments of weakness, but you learn to manage it."

His blue eyes looked lost. "For a second, I was back _there_. When He lived in my house, when I started to learn what it truly meant to be a Death Eater. There was a moment in the War, where I almost stayed with the Death Eaters."

"But you didn't. You made the right choice, which is more than I can say," I admitted. "This case is close to home, so we will both need to be careful."

"How do you deal with it?"

"Like this." I leaned in and kissed him.

This was a difficult life, one that made for a lonely existence. My past partners have understood that and this was how we coped. But, I had not planned to go down this road with Malfoy. Despite that, something drew me to him. Draco hesitated for a moment before pulling me closer. His kiss was hard, punishing, and I returned the roughness. We were always so volatile together and I was reaching for the zipper of my dress when Draco held my hand and pulled away.

"I can't sleep with you. That's how we die."

The moment was broken and I stood up. I found that sex during a mission was a good stress reliever, but I knew that not everyone agreed with that. "No. Feelings are what get us killed. Good night."

I disappeared up the stairs to our bedroom and was not surprised when he did not join me.

* * *

**Tuesday, January 15, 1998, time unknown**

Hermione had watched the sun rise and set twenty-two times since she was kidnapped. The cell was heavily warded and fortified against escape. Even if she had her wand, she doubted that she would be able to escape. Wherever here was. The hope that Harry and Ron dwindled until it disappeared completely. No one was coming for her. No one would save her from this hell.

"Crucio!"

Hermione prayed for death. The mission had been leaked and the Death Eaters pounced on the opportunity. Since her capture, Hermione had watched as the four members of her team were tortured to death in front of her. The Death Eaters fed on their fear, pain, and grief. This was a game to them.

"You didn't even ask me anything!" Hermione sobbed as her body trembled from the curse's after-effects. "I'll tell you anything, please, just kill me and get it over with."

Bellatrix Lestrange laughed. Her hand lovingly caressed Hermione's face and cackled when the young girl flinched away from her. "Now what would be the fun in killing you? My Lord has much bigger plans for you than simple interrogation."

If Hermione thought the Cruciatus Curse was the worst form of torture, she was quickly corrected. The dungeons echoed with her screams and its floors were painted red with her blood.


	4. Chapter 4

**Friday, April 28, 2000, 7:00 am**

"Mission report."

It was time for our weekly check-in with our Handler. He had told us to meet him at the Ministry, which was a risk that I was reluctant to take. Blaise Zabini and Theodore Nott both worked here. Zabini worked in International Law, while Nott worked in Magical Law Enforcement as a Hostage Negotiator. Those were the only two we knew were involved in the radical group, it was impossible to know how far that organization had spread. If Malfoy and I were spotted, it would draw suspicion and that would be the end of our mission.

"We have managed to infiltrate their social circle. Their plans revolve around the Solstice. Unspeakable 2 and I have yet to figure out anything concrete. We are still too new for them to trust us with anything of substance," I told our Handler.

Malfoy joined in. "We know that Blaise Zabini and Theodore Nott are involved. We have begun setting up a profile of their leader."

Our Handler did not answer right away, instead, he was rummaging through his bag. "We have received intel that important blueprints are located in this office," he said giving us each a dossier. "We have staked it out for you and provided a detailed schedule for shift changes, the security, and the like. You need to get those documents and give them to me by the end of the week."

I flipped through the file. It seemed like a pretty clear-cut assignment. Malfoy had already closed his dossier and resumed his bored expression. I was still undecided on how I felt about our Handler. I had never worked with this one before and therefore, I was taking a leap of faith trusting him.

"Where are the vials?" I asked when I was done inspecting the documents. It was a well-known fact that I was cautious. Rumours had spread about my particularities and I knew I was the butt of other Unspeakables' jokes. But a wisp of my blonde hair spotted during this raid could help the radicals identify us.

He rummaged through his bag and pulled them out. "I was also told to inform you that you are both off duty tonight. Harry Potter pulled some strings and has invited you both to the Burrow."

I threw the file on the table. "No. I will not be attending. I am in the middle of a mission. This could ruin weeks of preparation that I have spent into developing Lyra."

Malfoy was silent. Why was he invited? Not that I cared because I would prefer to spend months undercover with him than return to the Burrow. I could kill Harry for this.

"This is not a request; it is an order. The Head Unspeakable needs to be on good terms with the Auror office," our Handler said, putting his stuff away. "I advised the Head Unspeakable against it, but he chose to ignore my advice. Do not blow your cover. I should not need to remind you how important this mission is for all of us."

* * *

**Friday, April 28, 2000, 6:00 pm**

Malfoy and I were walking up the path to the Burrow. This was the last place that I wanted to be. I could hear laughter in the backyard and the smell of roasted chicken filled the air. Only Malfoy's presence forced me to go on. I did not want to show weakness in front of him after giving him a hard time last week. Thankfully, the weather had been unusually hot this past week. This explained why the Weasleys had planned something outdoors.

Harry greeted us at the door. He looked both nervous and happy to see me. As soon as I stepped through the door, Harry pulled me aside. Malfoy stood off to the side and waited for me. I was strangely grateful. I wouldn't have to walk into the backyard alone.

"Hermione, I know you're angry with me. This was the only way I could get you to come and see everyone."

"I am in the middle of a mission. Do you know the huge risk I am taking? I had to break my cover and in doing so, I have endangered myself," I snapped.

"You are always on missions. It's like you take them to spite me," Harry said, pushing his glasses up. I could tell he was angry with me and it was about time. He had been too understanding since the War and it was grinding on my nerves.

"Yes because everything always revolves around the Boy-Who-Won. My job as an Unspeakable, which you aren't even supposed to know about, is important to me. It is the only thing that makes sense these days, a way to turn what I learned in the war into something positive. What you did today was not right," I said and walked to Malfoy.

I was done with the whole situation. I understood where Harry was coming from, I really did. But how could I describe how I felt? Malfoy didn't comment on the situation and we walked out into the backyard together. Mr. and Mrs. Weasley were tending to the children, while Ron, Ginny, George, Bill, and their significant others were sitting on lawn chairs. Ron was in the middle of a story with large hand gestures and when he was finished, everyone burst into laughter.

"Why is Hermione with Draco?" George asked.

"They probably showed up at the same time," Ron said.

I rolled my eyes and tried to restrain myself from reaching out to Malfoy. After weeks of being undercover today, it was hard to separate this outing from the mission. We were not married, but two people at odds with each other. This was why I had objected to this, because even Malfoy was hovering around me. Being undercover was difficult and it was much easier when you could submerge yourself in the mission and return to reality when it was all over. Ginny got up and welcomed us.

"Hermione, I am surprised to see you here. Feel free to help yourself to some food," she said with a nervous smile. "Draco, where have you been? The letters we sent you were sent back. We were scared that something had happened to you. Teddy has been asking about you."

Malfoy rubbed the back of his neck, a sign that he was uncomfortable. "I'm sorry, Gin. I should have told you that I was sent abroad for work. How is Teddy?"

"He is going through another phase. This time, he magically throws food at every meal, refusing to eat anything but chocolate. I could kill him," she laughed.

"My mother said I had a bad sweet tooth as well. Where is the little monster?" Malfoy asked. He spotted the toddler and left me alone with Ginny.

The redhead turned towards me. "So you and Draco?"

"We showed up at the same time," I shrugged. I could tell she wanted to say something and I waited for her to build the courage. Maybe then she would leave me alone.

"Look, I know that you suffered in the war. We all did, frankly. Harry is still convinced that you'll come back to us. But you and I both know that won't happen," Ginny said. "Either stop this little act of yours and come back home or get out of our lives. Harry will be my family and I will protect him, even from you."

I had to close my eyes and focus on stopping the onslaught of memories that attacked my brain. Some of them were so clear, while others flickered to the front of my mind like photographs. I opened my eyes and looked around the yard. Children laughing, a meal shared with family, and love. Ginny was right, I didn't fit in here. I was too broken, damaged by the war and I doubt I could ever be fixed. I could never be the girl they wanted me to be.

A familiar arm wrapped around me. "Hermione has every right to be here. She is one of us."

"No, she is not one of us. We did not turn, fight for the other side during the war," Ginny snapped.

I was about to speak up, but Malfoy pulled me so that I was behind him. "Does that mean that I am no longer welcome?"

"That's not what I meant. You know that you are always welcome here. Draco, please don't go down this road again."

"I would go down this road without question, every time," Malfoy said. I didn't know what they were referring to. I was too stunned that he was defending me to wonder about it. "How do you think you would react under torture? I am sure that Harry told you that the Dark Lord himself was her frequent visitor."

"I would rather die than turn," Ginny said, her face red. "If she was truly on our side, she would have died like everyone else did rather than take orders from Him."

I had to squeeze my eyes shut as the flashbacks threatened to pull me under. How did Malfoy know something that I barely knew myself? He must have gotten close to Harry during the war to know such intimate details of our lives. I was tempted to hide my face in his side, but I would not show how much their words affected me. I stood up straight and stepped out of Malfoy's side. I would not let this child walk all over me.

"Your words show how naïve you are. Do you think that war is some fairytale? The hero always saves the day. Everyone's lives continue on like nothing happened? Your perfect world will come crumbling down around you and you will have no one to blame but yourself." No longer able to tolerate Ginny, I left and retreated into the house.

Mrs. Weasley was a creature of habit. Everything was in the same place it had been since I was eleven years old. It was like the Burrow had been frozen in time watching as the world around it changed. I grabbed a glass from the cupboard and poured myself a glass of water.

I needed to regroup. This was the reason I never showed up. Ginny's opinion was shared by several others. I was regarded an outsider, someone that could no longer be trusted. No one - other than those who had been forced to endure such horrors - understood what it was like to be captured. To be tortured over and over again until you lost all concept of time, of yourself. Initially, every moment was spent trying to find a way to survive. Eventually, you kept trying to die but they would keep you alive against your will.

Harry was the only person who knew a little bit of what I had endured. He had confessed it to me shortly after the war. He was forced to enter the Dark Lord's mind during His sessions with me, unable to do anything to save me. It threatened to tear him apart. Harry blamed my _brokenness_ on himself. It was the reason he was trying so hard to save me. He wouldn't be able to live with himself if he stopped trying. It was a truth that Ginny did not know, her innocent little mind couldn't understand.

"I'm sorry about Ginny."

I turned around and tried my best smile. "Thanks, Ron. We both know that she's right. I don't belong here anymore."

His hands were shoved in his jeans. He kept his distance. I don't know if I was grateful or hurt by that. "It's hard. When I look at you, all I see is her. But then you talk or you do something that she would never do and it's like losing her all over again."

"What do you want me to do? To say? That I'm sorry? I look at myself in the mirror and I don't even recognize the person that I've become," I said turning around to look out the window. Harry and Ginny were fighting. That's what I brought, conflict and chaos. It was easier to watch that than look at Ron. "But I'm tired of saying sorry. This is the person that I am now. You guys need to stop trying to 'bring' me back because that Hermione died in the war and she's not coming back."

Ron had walked up to me. He was so close that if I shifted my weight back, I would be leaning against him. I held my breath, waiting to see what he would do. "I can't do this anymore."

My eyes fluttered shut and my heart broke when he left the kitchen. Harry spotted me from outside and waved me over. I contemplated leaving. I didn't know how much more I could handle. It felt like everything was unraveling around me. But part of me could never say no to Harry. I made my way outside and tried to ignore the glare that Ginny sent me as she joined her family off to the side.

His green eyes caught my mood immediately. "Ginny never should have said those things to you."

"Harry, I understand that you feel guilty, but you need to let me go. Even Ron can't bear to be near me. _Just let me go_ ," I pleaded.

He pulled me towards him and wrapped his arms around me. "What you and Ron had… It was different. You guys were in love. You need to give him a break," Harry said. "I don't want you here because I feel guilty. I want you here because you have been the one person that has never given up on me. You can push me away, you can hate me, but I will always be there for you. You are my sister and family comes first."

"Why?"

"Because you have never left me. Even Ron can't say that. I'm sorry for forcing you here. I made a mistake. I will give you space, but I would like to see you. We can just spend time together – me and you – and get to know each other again?"

I squeezed my eyes shut so he wouldn't know I was crying. "I did leave you, Harry. I turned into a monster. I have done some awful things. Things that there is no coming back from."

"That was never your choice. Your will was taken from you. Don't you remember the doubts I used to have? That having Voldemort in my mind was turning me evil? War is not a pretty thing, but we do what we need to survive. And we survived, Hermione. We are still here."

He kissed the top of my head and released me. I was surprised to see the backyard had emptied at some point and I was grateful for the privacy. Harry wiped my tears and I nodded. "No more family gatherings."

"I promise. Don't be a stranger," Harry said as he walked me to the front of the house.

I was surprised to see Malfoy waiting for me.

"I will take it from here," the blond said and I bristled at the implication of being weak.

"Take good care of her, Draco."

Harry hugged me one last time before Malfoy and I apparated home.

* * *

**Tuesday, March 24, 1998, 11:00 pm**

He walked down the hallway that would lead him to victory. It had been a risk, but if they were successful… This would mean the end of Potter and all those pathetic blood traitors, half-bloods, and mudbloods. The cell doors swung open with a wave of his hand, the clattering of metal against stone echoed down the corridor.

"My Lord, it is ready at last," Bellatrix said, bowing to him. He could hear the giddiness in her voice, a useless emotion. But it was her feelings that made her such a devoted follower.

"Bring it forward," he snapped.

Two of his followers grabbed the creature and dragged it to the center of the room. He could already see the use of it. The thing would be attractive if it gained a bit of weight. The breaking in process was always difficult. Many had died in previous experiments and it showed just how strong this thing was to have endured through it. He lifted its chin and was surprised to see blank brown eyes stare back at him. He had always seen defiance in this gaze. The swell of hope bloomed in his chest.

"What is your name?"

She did not flinch at his tone; her gaze had returned to the floor. "Hermione Granger, my Lord."

"Who do you serve?" he asked, curious.

"You, my Lord."

"Are you willing to sacrifice yourself to the Cause?"

"Yes, my Lord."

"You will kill Harry Potter when the time comes."

Her gaze returned to him, the promise glittering in her eyes. "I will kill Harry Potter when the time comes, my Lord."

He released a burst of laughter that was so powerful that it almost shook the foundation of the castle. Yes, the future looked very promising indeed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will be more action packed. What did you think? How was Voldemort's POV? (That was definitely not planned). Thank you for reading!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was the hardest chapter that I've written to date. I ended up rewriting it over seven times now and I'm feeling pretty good about this draft. Let me know what you think!

**Monday, May 1, 2000, 6:00 pm**

Beads of sweat rolled down my face, but I ignored it. Adjusting my gloves one last time, I got into my boxing stance. Metallica blared from the speakers overhead, the blood pumping in my veins as I readied myself.

There were no words to describe how good it felt landing the first punch. Retracting my hand, I started going through my drill. _Punch, jab, hook._ Repeat. The sound of my fist connecting with the punching bag over and over again echoed in the otherwise empty gym.

I found this place shortly after the war ended. Everyone I knew was moving on, getting married, and starting a family. I was angry, full of rage when Harry snapped me out of my _reprogramming_. The Dark Lord had changed me, twisted me to the point that I didn't recognize myself. And I felt cheated when I saw all those new families strolling down the street without a care in the world. Like the war had never happened. I didn't handle it well and I was going down a dark path, but this time I would have no one to blame but myself. I was drinking every night, staying out late, and I didn't care who I hurt. After one particularly awful night where I was certain Harry would never talk to me again, I stumbled across this muggle gym and it saved my life. Boxing gave me an outlet, a way for me to release the frustration, jealousy, and self-hatred that threatened to consume me.

After the gathering at the Burrow, I was left in a similar state of mind. Ginny's poisonous words, Ron's cold rejection, and Harry's unfailing love were too much for my heart to handle. I tried to forget that day, to re-immerse myself in the mission, but I couldn't. They had gotten under my skin. I was losing control of my emotions and I was livid that they still affected me so much. I poured every ounce of anger into my punches, praying for peace of mind. Not even the gym's familiar smell of sweat and chalk soothed me.

_Punch, jab, hook._ Repeat.

It wasn't until my muscles trembled with exhaustion that I allowed myself to admit what was really bothering me. Since our return from the Burrow, Malfoy had been consistently avoiding me. Sure, I saw him when we needed to discuss the mission but he always found an excuse to leave as soon as the conversation was over. Dirty dishes in the sink, the shower turning on in the middle of the night, and the lingering cinnamon and wood cologne were the only evidence that I wasn't living alone. I hadn't asked Malfoy to come to my defense during Ginny's verbal lashing, but I was still paying the price.

I should have been relieved with the minimal interaction. Merlin only knew how many times I had wished to be alone. But the house felt too big, too empty, too cold without him.

I collapsed on the ground and tried to calm my labored breathing. The real issue was that I had come to rely on Malfoy. And I felt weak for needing someone after being alone for so long.

* * *

**Tuesday, May 2, 2000, 2:00 pm**

"Lyra, what can I do for you?" Pansy Parkinson asked from behind the desk.

I barely recognized her when I stepped into her office. Her raven hair was neatly pulled into a chignon and she wore minimal makeup, a completely different look than I was used to seeing. To be honest, I never thought about Pansy's professional life, but certificates tastefully placed on the walls demonstrated her competence. The sound of her scratching quill reminded me that I was intruding on her work day. Showing up at her office had been a spontaneous decision. How could I tell Pansy that I sought her out because I felt lonely? There were only so many workouts, research, and solitude I could take before the restlessness became too much. I took the offered seat, surprised at how uncomfortable the chic, black chair was.

"What are you doing tonight?" I asked.

Pansy pulled out a purple planner and flipped through it. "Tonight, I have a dinner with the President of St. Mungo's and the Head of Wizarding Law. It looks like I'm booked up all week until our dinner at Blaise's on Friday."

"You keep strange company for dinner," I said, furrowing my brow. What did a fashion magazine editor, a hospital president, and a lawyer have in common?

"I have known Patrick and Henry for years. I try to stay actively involved in the community and get to know its leaders. People underestimate the power of media and I try to keep my readers informed," Pansy said. She set down her quill, her blue eyes assessing me. "Tell you what, you should join me tonight. It would give you the opportunity to meet more people. I hear that Theo and Blaise have been hogging Edward lately."

I was embarrassed with the relief I felt at her invitation. Had I really grown that desperate for company? No, this would benefit the mission. Tonight would be the perfect opportunity to learn more about Pansy and the sphere of influence she had. Pansy told me the time and the name of the restaurant they were meeting at and I left in a hurry. I only had four hours to research and prepare to meet the President of St. Mungo's and the Head of Wizarding Law and every second counted.

* * *

**Wednesday, May 3, 2000, 11:00 pm**

The bitter wind cut through my cloak and I shivered, wrapping the Unspeakable uniform tightly around me. Of course, Malfoy looked comfortable and warm as he ran diagnostics spells on the wards of the building we were about to break into. We had decided yesterday after my dinner with Pansy that we should complete our assignment a few days before our deadline.

My evening with Pansy had been illuminating. She was indeed good friends with Patrick and Henry. The night was spent talking about catching up, laughing, and discussing politics and office drama. Pansy was more intelligent than I gave her credit for. Her position as a fashion editor gave her access to high profile events, giving her the opportunity to meet different Ministry and Wizengamot members. The raven-haired witch was on first name basis with the men and their wives. Not to mention the influence she had on the magazine's readers.

What took me off guard was how kind Pansy was. She was nothing but inclusive and welcoming to me since we first met at the Rosiers' party. The raven-haired woman could sense that I was upset about something and asked me to stay behind after the dinner was over. Before I knew it, I was telling her about my 'marital' problems with Edward. Pansy patted my cheek, ordered me a glass of wine, and started telling me about her recent breakup. I knew that I was only there because of the mission, but I couldn't help but like her.

"Standard security measures. We just need to stun and obliviate the guard," Malfoy said. "Did you pack everything we need?"

I scoffed. "Of course, I did. We have extra wands, potions, and the decryption stone," I said, pulling up my hood.

We shrunk our brooms and put them in our bags. I was uncomfortable with obliviating the guard. It reminded me too much of my own memory problems and my parents' irreversible obliviation. But our assignment called for it and I was not one to disobey without cause. And I was determined to return to my pre-Weasley gathering state. I would not let my emotions cloud my judgment. That was how Unspeakables died.

Malfoy pulled up his own hood and I cast a disillusion charm on us both. We quickly walked towards the building. The adrenaline was kicking in as we walked through the front door. I loved this part of missions because my senses were on overdrive. Everything looked sharper, sounds were louder, and I could feel the energy rippling in the air. I heard the guard before I saw him and gestured to Malfoy.

" _Stupefy_."

" _Obliviate._ "

While Malfoy altered the guard's memory, I helped the muggle fall softly to the floor. He looked like a kind man with his round face and the smile that crept up on his face even while he was asleep. I ignored the guilt I felt and followed Malfoy up the stairs. We climbed up to the fifth floor with ease, the moonlight our guide through the unfamiliar building. Sometimes, I swore that I heard footsteps or saw something out of the corner of my eye. I knew it was my mind playing tricks on me – a result from lack of sleep – but it still made my heart race and my palms sweat.

It seemed like it took us forever but it also took us no time at all to reach the office. Our mission was simple. Retrieve a set of documents from a safe behind the abstract painting and return them to our Handler. We had decided early on that Malfoy would break into the safe, while I would comb through the office and be on the lookout in case someone else showed up.

The office was small and cramped, which surprised me. There were only the essentials: a desk, chair, and a small couch that barely fit in the room. A thick coat of dust covered the surfaces and I wondered why our bosses thought the documents would be here. The name plate on the desk had a silvery glow. _Theodore Nott._ I wondered how Malfoy felt breaking into his former friend's office. But he seemed to have no qualms about it.

He strode to the large painting behind the desk, removed it from the wall, and started working on breaking into the safe. I followed my partner and started rummaging through the papers on the desk with one hand while my other hand held my illuminated wand. There were files, invoices, and reports but nothing seemed related to the new Death Eaters. Regardless, I made a copy of everything. I was known to be thorough, but it was also because something didn't add up. Since Malfoy and I started the mission, there were no hints or clues that the group wanted to resurrect the Dark Lord. Something was missing. I hoped that what we found tonight would indicate what their plan was.

The safe door popped open. Malfoy grabbed the contents and put them on the desk. There were rolls of parchment, envelopes, and folders. They were all blank, but this was to be expected. Our Handler told us that the documents were encrypted as a fail-safe. I pulled out the decryption stone from my bag, set it on the desk, and whispered the activation phrase. Words should have appeared on the page, but they remained stubbornly blank. I tried again, but the result remained the same.

"Let me try," Malfoy said, pushing me over slightly. He said the activation phrase a third time and words appeared, only they were the wrong ones. _Your time is running out_ was repeated over and over on the papers. "What does this mean?"

"It means that we have minutes to escape this office before the Death Eaters show up," I said and my words were enough to jolt us back to reality.

Malfoy shoved the documents into his bag and I flicked my wand around the room to remove any traces that we had been here. My hands were shaking and I hoped that Malfoy didn't notice. Footsteps pounding up the steps froze me to the spot.

They were here.

My hands were sweating so much that I had trouble gripping my wand. Malfoy hissed at me to grab my broom. I followed his command, enlarging it and hopping on. The voices were getting louder and I knew we were seconds away from discovery, despite being disillusioned. One look was all Malfoy and I needed to create a plan. He blasted the window while I threw as many locking spells that I knew at the door. I could feel the tremors from the Death Eaters' spells as they tried to break in.

Jumping on the broom, I followed Malfoy out the window just as they burst into the office. I thought we were in the clear, but a curse managed to graze my arm before we disappeared into the night sky.

* * *

**Thursday, May 4, 2000, 1:00 am**

"What the hell was that?" Malfoy asked the moment we stepped through the green flames.

We had flown across the country, made sure there were no tracking charms on the documents, broke into a house and used their floo network. We flooed through seven different houses before feeling safe enough to return to our temporary home. Even though I knew we were safe, part of me was waiting for the Death Eaters to show up at our front door. I was on edge, my thoughts running a million miles a minute, repeating the same question. What the hell was that?

My body was desperate for a shower, but there was more important work to be done. I walked up the stairs to the office and was surprised to hear footsteps follow me. Malfoy and I pulled out the things we had collected from Theo's office and let them fall on the floor.

"Granger," his tone was firm, a warning that he would not let his question go unanswered.

I rolled my eyes. "What? I don't know what happened either."

"It should have been an easy assignment," Malfoy said, sitting on the floor. I wanted to make a comment about how he was dirtying his robes, but I refrained. "Other Unspeakables staked out the office and the source revealed that the documents would be encrypted."

"It was the decryption that went wrong. Hold on, I think I have a textbook that will help," I said rushing off to the master bedroom. I located my bag, hidden at the bottom of the closet, and started looking at my book collection. I found two books that might have the information I needed, grabbed them and hurried back to the office. "Here, look through this book and I'll look through this one."

I expected a retort or an insult, but I was surprised that Malfoy immediately started reading. I took a seat across from him and opened the hardcover textbook. The only sound in our house was the sound of pages turning.

I found it difficult to concentrate. I was light headed, the words were blurring together, and I knew that I should stop. The adrenaline had left my body and what it needed were food and rest. But the desire to know what went wrong and how royally screwed we were kept me going.

"I found something," I said, relieved and excited that I was one step closer to my bed. "We were given the wrong decryption stone. The right one would have established a magnetic force between the ink on the scrolls and the stone, forcing the ink to the surface and darken. But the stone we were given has heating properties, which temporarily demagnetized the ink. The warmth activated a safety feature and alerted the Death Eaters to our late-night activities. It's a bit more complicated than that, of course."

I handed the book to Malfoy but was surprised when he grabbed my arm instead. "Granger, you're bleeding," he said, pushing up my sleeve. My hand was bloody and I wondered how I hadn't noticed. He grabbed his wand and healed the gash on my arm. "Lucky for you, it was only a slicing spell. Are you always this reckless on missions?"

"Never mind that. Do you know what this means?" I said pushing the book towards him.

"Enlighten me."

"There's a mole," I said and held up my hands when I saw the outrage on his face. "Think about it. How convenient is it that we were given the wrong stone, one that alerted the Death Eaters to our presence?"

Malfoy looked at the textbook. "The stones are practically identical. Anyone could have made that mistake. I've worked with the department longer than you have. No one would betray us."

"Anyone could have made that mistake, but not an Unspeakable. The people who helped set up this assignment knew the properties of the ink and the encryption, it was there in our report. Someone did not want us to get these documents."

The silence was deafening. I could almost hear the wheels turning in his head as he processed the information. I summoned a chocolate bar from downstairs and munched on it while I waited, the hint of caramel was everything I wanted and more at that moment. My lightheadedness almost disappeared after I finished the bar.

"I will admit that you make a strong argument. What should we do?" Malfoy asked, stretching his arms. He had taken off his robes long ago and the shirt he wore lifted slightly with the movement revealing a toned, pasty abdomen. I averted my eyes just in time to avoid being caught staring.

"We need to figure out who the mole is. Until we do, we can't trust anyone."

He sighed. "I have a plan. We will tell our Handler that we didn't get the documents. The Death Eaters arrived immediately and we had to escape or risk being compromised. Only the traitor will know that we still have the documents. And while we wait for him to make his move, we will decrypt the documents ourselves with the right stone."

"Your plan has merit, but there's only one problem. The source that gave the Unspeakables this intel will also know that we have the documents and will tell our Handler," I said.

"That's a risk we'll have to take. Do you have a better idea?"

"No."

Before I could say anything else, Malfoy got up and bid me goodnight. I watched him disappear into the spare bedroom without another word. I was too tired to analyze his behavior and fell asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.

* * *

**Friday, May 5, 2000, 5:00 pm**

Tonight was the first time in weeks that Malfoy and I would pose as a couple. We were invited to an exclusive dinner at Blaise's. Theo, Daphne, and Pansy were the only other people that would be attending, which suited me. My instincts were screaming at me that they were at the heart of the new Death Eaters. Despite our efforts, neither Malfoy or I were invited into the fold and I was losing faith that they would ever trust us.

After the fiasco assignment, Malfoy and I had been working overtime. We were trying every connection that we could to buy this rare decryption stone but we had yet to successfully find one. Our Handler believed our lie, but I knew that our time was running out. The punishment would be severe if we got caught in our lie. Malfoy and I would be branded traitors and that was a fate to be avoided at all costs.

"Lyra! Thank Merlin you are finally here. I thought that I was going to die of boredom," Pansy said when she spotted us in the doorway.

"Thanks, Pans! I'm glad that you think so highly of me," Blaise yelled from further in the apartment.

Malfoy helped me with my jacket. The faint leather, cinnamon, and wood cologne and his close proximity set off butterflies in my stomach. He hung up our jackets – when did he take his off? – and took a step before pausing. My fake husband turned around and before I could ask what he was doing, he leaned in and kissed me. It was a short peck, I barely had time to register his soft lips before he was gone. When I saw that Pansy was watching me, I commended Malfoy on his quick thinking.

"Looks like there is no longer trouble in paradise," she said when I joined her on the leather couch. Pansy looked like herself again with her dark makeup and her short skirt. She was the type of witch that always kept you guessing. She could be both appropriate and impolite, charming and provocative. Pansy's mood changed suddenly and without warning, leaving you to navigate the mine field.

The apartment was an open concept with a modern design. Everything was straight lines, in shades of grey, and immaculate. What was it with purebloods and their impeccable style? I was happy that I could keep an eye on Blaise and Malfoy in the kitchen. They were in deep conversation.

"Any new suitors?"

Pansy rolled her eyes. "No one of interest."

"What about Blaise? I see the way you guys look at each other when you think no one else is watching," I smirked, before squinting at the sight in the kitchen. "Is Blaise cooking?"

"Wait until you taste his food, you will never want to eat anywhere else again. And it's complicated,' she said.

A knock at the door interrupted my reply. I knew that it wasn't Theo, as he would just waltz in. Pansy got up to answer it and I followed her. I could sense the tension in the room as Blaise and Malfoy paused their conversation to come to the door. My hand hovered near my wand holster subconsciously and I had to force my hands into my pocket.

Pansy opened the door and I could picture the smirk on her face. "Potter, I don't remember sending you an invitation."

"I am here on official business. Can I come in?" Harry asked.

She stepped aside and shut the door behind him. I was surprised to see my best friend alone. Weren't they supposed to have partners? What if this was an ambush? Malfoy came to my side and wrapped his arm around me. The motion drew Harry's attention, suspicion lurking in those emerald eyes. It was strange to see that side of him and I had to remember that I was Lyra Harrington tonight.

"Harry Potter has graced us with his presence. The most powerful man in England," Blaise said, tossing a towel on the counter and stepping into the living room.

"I have some questions to ask you. Is there somewhere more private we could go?"

Blaise rolled his eyes. "There is no need. These are my close friends."

"Where were you on May third at eleven fifteen at night?" Harry asked.

A shiver ran down my side when I realized that was the night Malfoy and I broke into Theo's office. What did the Aurors know? Anger swelled in my gut as I realized how idiotic Harry's boss was. There was an ongoing Unspeakable investigation and mission and this line of questioning could spook the new wave of Death Eaters. I wish there was a way to tell Harry to leave before he ruined our mission.

"I was with Pansy and Theo at the Plaza. If you need confirmation, you can contact the Head Chef. He personally visited our table," Blaise said, any warmth in his voice gone.

"Were you aware that a muggle was illegally obliviated at your office on May third?" Harry asked, pulling out a notebook and glancing at it. I wanted to hit him over the head. Did the Auror and Unspeakable Department never communicate? The obliviation was done with the Ministry's permission. I was going to have a good, long talk with our Handler and the Head Unspeakable at this show of incompetence. "Bill Waters. He is the security guard at your firm."

"No, this matter was not brought to my attention."

Harry stuffed the notebook back into this pocket. "One last question, why do a lawyer and a hostage negotiator share an office in a muggle neighborhood?"

"The office space is cheap. Some of my clients feel uncomfortable at the Ministry, which is why I meet them elsewhere. Theodore's experience in Magical Law Enforcement makes him a good consultant. I am sure you are aware of his promotion in the coming months," Blaise trailed off. "You come into my home while I am entertaining guests and for what? An observation? If you have any charges, then arrest me. If not, you know the way out."

Harry and Blaise glared at each other before my best friend looked away. His green eyes settled on me. "There is something familiar about you."

I could kill Harry, throttle him for being such an idiot but Pansy intervened. "Unless you have been to Canada, then you haven't met. Do we need to ask you to leave a third time, Potter?"

Her sharp words were enough to make him leave. Once the door clicked shut behind him, Pansy pulled Blaise into the kitchen. They were fighting, their voices low and the words indecipherable from here. The smell of beef wafted into the living room and I wondered if we were ever going to eat. Malfoy's arm was still slung over my shoulder and I drew comfort from his presence. This evening was not going according to plan.

While we waited for their fight to end, Theo entered the apartment. He shrugged off his jacket and hung it neatly next to mine. His cheeks were a little flushed and his socks were mismatched, but there was nothing else to indicate that his office had been broken into. He joined us and glanced at the couple in the kitchen.

"How long have they been going at it for?"

Malfoy chuckled. "Ten minutes now."

Theo smirked, but then his expression sobered when they realized he had arrived. Pansy's eyes swept the room. "Where's Daphne?"

"She's not feeling well, so I told her to stay home," he said before changing the conversation. "We hit a snag. There's been a break-in at the office."

Blaise cursed. "That's why Potter was here. Was anything taken?"

"They wiped us clean. Everything was encrypted, but we should proceed quickly and without delay." I saw Pansy's subtle gesture towards us and was surprised by Theo's answer. "They have proven themselves trustworthy. Blaise and I were going to bring them into the fold tonight anyways."

"We should discuss this over dinner. There's no point loitering by the front door," Blaise said.

We moved together as one to set the table and serve the food. The steak drizzled with sauce, mashed potatoes, and steamed vegetables cooked in a garlic sauce made my mouth water and I was surprised nothing had burned with all the interruptions. It wasn't long before we were all seated and had started eating. I tried to draw as little attention to myself as I could, hoping that the others forgot Malfoy and I were here and divulged as much as possible.

"Why didn't you tell me there was a break-in?" Blaise asked.

Theo shrugged. "I had it under control. Our mole was not able to alert me in time, but he swapped out the Unspeakable's decryption device and activated our fail-safe."

"If the Ministry does not have access to our plans, why do you want to speed up our timeline?" Pansy asked.

"The Ministry knows enough if the Unspeakables felt confident enough to break into our office. Add the fact that Potter was here tonight," Theo trailed off.

No one answered, the only sound in the apartment was the scraping of utensils on the plates. Theo was right, the Aurors were going to be a problem. If Harry had even the tiniest inkling something was off, he would not rest until he figured out what was wrong.

"Is there anything we can do to help?" I asked.

"How much do you know about the War?" Blaise asked, his hazel eyes regarding me seriously.

Malfoy had finished eating and vanished his plate. "We are well informed."

This was the moment we had been waiting for and I felt giddy and nervous now that it had arrived. It took all my concentration to remain cool and collected.

"We are part of a group that does not believe that muggleborns and muggles have a place in our world," Theo said. "Our views are not as harsh as the Dark Lord's. We do not want their deaths. We do not even wish them ill-will, only to reinforce the barrier between the two worlds."

"Why are you against muggleborns and not half-bloods?" I asked, though my real question was: why is it always the muggleborns? Wasn't it the purebloods turn to be oppressed for once?

"Half-bloods are taught the traditions of our culture. Muggleborns, on the other hand, try to infect our world with their ideas. Their aim is always to abolish the Statute of Secrecy," Theodore explained.

"How will you remove muggleborns from our society?" Malfoy asked.

Pansy smirked. "We are planning an attack that will rock the foundations of our world."

"I thought that you did not wish for violence or their death?" I asked, goosebumps erupting on my arms.

"For change to happen, we must first create terror. Enough that the muggleborns will return to the muggle world," she said.

I didn't say anything. How could I respond to such a statement? Malfoy had stiffened in his chair and for once, I had no comfort to offer him. Had our schoolmates not had enough of war and terror? Had they not learned their lesson?

The thing that made me uncomfortable was that a small part of me was excited by such plans. No matter how much work I threw myself into or time I spent with the psychologist, I would never be able to fully eradicate the changes the Dark Lord forced upon me. And that was the side of me that wanted to join in their plans wholeheartedly.

Malfoy recovered first. "What do you want us to do?"

* * *

**Sunday, May 7, 2000, 8:00 pm**

Malfoy was holed up in the office again. The faint sound of a quill scratching was the only indication that he was there. I had planned what I would say, recited it, but now that I was standing outside the closed door, I hesitated. This could make things between us more awkward. I really should just leave well enough alone. With that thought, I stepped away from the door.

I had only made it two steps before I stopped. I was a grown woman and it was a simple conversation. Plus, it involved the mission. Before I could talk myself out of it for the third time, I knocked on the door and heard a faint "Come in."

Taking a deep breath, I opened the door and poked my head into the room. "Can I talk to you?"

"Did you find out where they are planning their attack?" Malfoy asked, moving books off the spare chair and offering it to me.

"No. Once we get those documents decrypted, I should have a better idea. I actually wanted to talk to you about something else."

He was out of his glamour at the moment. Familiar grey eyes ringed with dark circles watched me. He kept glancing at his half-finished notes, making me feel more self-conscious. I felt bad for bringing this up when he looked so worn out. The mission was taking its toll on us both. But, this was important.

"Why have you been avoiding me?"

"I haven't been. We both have our individual assignments on this mission and I have been working on mine," he said, running a hand through his white-blond hair.

I adjusted my position on the wooden chair, trying not to let my temper get the best of me. "Things have been different since we returned from the Burrow. I didn't ask you to come to my defense. I don't understand why you've been short and awkward with me since."

"I don't want to talk about this time. Neither of us can afford to be distracted."

"We need to talk about it because it is distracting. We're partners and right now, I don't trust that you have my back. What's your problem?" I prodded before a crazy idea popped into my head. "Do you have feelings for me?"

"No, Granger, I do not have feelings for you. I told you about the woman I loved. Sometimes you can be so nosy and it drives me insane," Malfoy said standing up. "She was my partner in the war and the Dark Lord killed her. Sometimes, you remind me of her and that's why I would never have taken this mission if I had known you were to be my partner. Is that enough information or do you want my life story while we're at it?"

I was taken aback by the fury in his tone and I felt guilty. But that was quickly followed by anger and I stood up so that we were face to face. "Do not take that tone with me. I don't care if I remind you of her or your mother. We are partners and this mission is more important than us. Are you going to let your personal feelings get in the way of saving the people of London?"

With that, I stormed out of the room. I couldn't believe his nerve! He was so hot and cold and I could never keep up with his moods. What really bothered me was the way his voice softened when he talked about her or how even after death, this woman still had Malfoy ensnared. How could I compete with a dead woman?

That thought stopped me dead in my tracks as horror filled me. I had fallen for Draco Malfoy, a man that I did not like nor could stand. And I had just pushed him away and ruined any chance at a friendship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your patience with this chapter. I was wondering what the best way to inform you lovely readers is when I have news or updates. I wanted to let you guys know that I was still working on this, but I wasn't quite sure where to post that. Any thoughts?
> 
> And what did you think of this chapter?


	6. Chapter 6

**Monday, April 13, 1998, 8:00 pm**

"You will spend your days training until the Dark Lord finds you suitable," Bellatrix said, her sharp nails digging into Hermione's arm as the raven-haired witch dragged her down the stone corridor. "I think it's a waste of time. You're too soft to become a Death Eater."

Hermione did not answer and bit her lip to keep from crying out in pain. She was certain her arm would be covered in finger-sized bruises. She did not understand Bellatrix's dislike for her but Hermione would prove her wrong. She stumbled when Bellatrix shoved her into a room but was relieved that she had escaped her grip.

Her gaze was drawn to the man standing in the middle of the room. His white-blond hair threatened to escape the elastic that kept it out of his face. His alabaster skin almost blended into the wall behind him, unmarred except for the black mark on his left arm. He was in the middle of a fighting exercise when they walked in. His moves were graceful but so fast that her eyes had trouble following his maneuvers.

"Nephew," Bellatrix snapped, interrupting the peaceful silence.

The man stopped as soon as he completed a kick and turned to face them. His slate eyes widened when he saw Hermione, but otherwise, his face betrayed no other emotion.

"I have brought you your latest project. Do you remember your orders?"

The man nodded. Bellatrix turned around and left, her footsteps echoing down the hallway. Hermione was happy to see her go. That woman was the definition of unpleasant.

"My name is Draco Malfoy. I am going to train you in hand-to-hand combat. Once I have deemed you ready, you will begin your missions. Any questions?"

"No, sir."

His brow furrowed at her response. Draco led her to the middle of the mat and began to teach her the basic fighting stance.

* * *

**Thursday, May 18, 2000, 9:00 am**

The dreams were getting worse. Nightmare and reality were slowly blending together and I was scared I was losing my mind. They started shortly after I was assigned this mission. I think it was because I was dealing with matters so close to home. Gone was the logic that I prized above all else, leaving me a nervous wreck. I was scared that I was going to break my cover. I jumped at every little sound, to the point that Malfoy told me to get ahold of myself. I avoided going to sleep, terrified that I would find myself trapped in another one of those nightmares.

I swore to myself that I would never return to this place after our last session, but I was left with little choice. Malfoy and I were questioning an antique dealer in hopes of finding someone in possession of the decryption stone we needed. I could tell the man knew more than he was letting on. I let my frustration get the best of me and I almost crossed the line in our interrogation, Malfoy stopping me in time. I was becoming a stranger to myself and I needed to understand why.

"Miss Granger, what brings you in?" the Unspeakable psychologist asked as soon as I stepped into her tidy office.

I was convinced that Dr. Park was secretly a robot or a serial killer. She was always put together wearing her typical pencil skirt and silk shirt combo, an outfit straight out of a fashion magazine. The psychologist always knew the right things to say, the proper way to act, and I hated her for it. Dr. Park was the cool, logical person that I always wanted but failed to be. Only the fear that I was about to lose control brought me back here.

I took the offered leather chair. "I have been having severe nightmares and as a result, I haven't been able to sleep."

"Tell me about them."

"The first one was about an Order mission. I was working with Harry and Ron trying to secure a Death Eater safe house when I was captured. I had another dream that I was held prisoner, another that I was being tortured within an inch of my sanity," I glanced down at my hands. I was hoping that she would give me some Dreamless Sleep and then I leave this sterile office. She made me continue until I told her almost every dream I had since I started this mission.

Dr. Park set down her clipboard. "What brought you in to see me? I know how much you dread our sessions."

"My nightmare yesterday shook me. I thought that Harry wanted to kill me and I wanted to join the Dark Lord's cause. The strangest part was at the very end. Unspeakable Two was my mentor. He was supposed to train me in combat."

"He is your current partner, is he not?" she asked, looking down at her file. "Draco Malfoy? It looks like you two shared quite the history during your school days."

I shrugged, not wanting to get into it. "He was a bully. Harry and Malfoy did not get alone while we were at Hogwarts. I often wound up in the middle of their arguments."

"Why do you think you are having these dreams now?"

"This is the first mission that I have had to deal with Death Eaters and with students that I went to school with. I don't know, isn't it your job to figure that out?" I snapped, a headache creeping up behind my temples.

"It's very interesting that you should say that. It is known that you operated as a Death Eater for a year, is there any chance that you interacted with the people you are dealing with?" Dr. Park asked.

I shifted in the uncomfortable chair. "You said that after the first year that my memories did not return, the likelihood that I would ever remember my past was slim."

"Not much is known about the torture techniques that Tom Riddle implemented on both his victims and his followers. It is very possible that these dreams that you are having are memories. There is a great level of detail when you tell me about the dreams and the fact that you only get snippets tells me that these are not dreams," Dr. Park said taking off her glasses and rubbing her nose. "If Mr. Malfoy was indeed your mentor, then working with him once again and dealing with the new Death Eaters could be what triggered your memory. Add in the stress of being undercover…"

I stopped listening to her, trying to turn her words over in my mind. I had always felt blessed not to remember the worst periods of my life. My body's reactions were enough to tell me that year was not a pleasant one and I did not care to open that can of worms. But it looked like my mind was not giving me a choice in the matter. I thought that I had moved on with my life, found peace in working as an Unspeakable, but it was clear that I had been running away from my time as a Death Eater.

"Is there anything that I can do to stop the memories?"

Dr. Park frowned. "No, and stopping them would do more harm than good. This is part of your recovery, the key to unlocking your past. I will tell the Head Unspeakable to remove you from your current mission. We can resume our biweekly sessions."

"No," I almost shouted. "I am at a very delicate point in this mission. The targets are beginning to trust us and if you were to pull me out, they will get spooked."

"Very well. Visit me if it becomes too much," Dr. Park said when it was clear that I would not change my mind. "Here are some things that you can do to ease the transition. I want to see you in one week."

* * *

**Friday, May 19, 2000, 8:30 am**

My invitation to join the new Death Eaters was only a courtesy. Theo and Blaise invited Malfoy to meetings, talked to him about their plans. Even now, the blond was with them and wouldn't be back until tomorrow. It was my fault that I was excluded. I had led Theo and Blaise to believe that Lyra was harmless, they didn't know my skills or my intelligence. Pansy had been the one to vouch for me, the only reason they had invited me along. At first, it bothered me. I kept replaying my interactions with Theo and Blaise, wondering if there was something I could have done differently. I was not used to being on the sidelines. But as the nightma- _memories_ grew more frequent, I was relieved that Malfoy was their go-to person.

I had long suspected that the dreams were more than nightmares, but I was not prepared for the finality I felt when Dr. Park confirmed it. My first instinct was to corner Malfoy and demand an explanation. The last memory showed that we had a history. Why had he hidden it? The first time we sparred together on this mission, he asked me where I learned to fight. He was testing me, why? I resisted the urge to confront him because I didn't know all the details of our past. How involved was he in my life as a Death Eater? How much did he know? If there was one thing that I hated, it was when people knew more than me. I wanted to remember everything before confronting him so that he couldn't lie to me.

I needed to know the truth.

My solution went against everything Dr. Park had advised. The smoke made my eyes water as I stirred the potion clockwise for the eleventh time. As soon as it turned periwinkle, I turned the burner off and carried the cauldron to the counter. I carefully poured the concoction into a flask, biting my lip with the effort. With shaking hands, I carried the potion up to the bedroom. Setting it down on the nightstand, I changed into a nightgown and slipped under the cool covers of my bed. I tried to convince myself out of this reckless plan. There was a reason that I was only remembering one memory at a time. If I drank this potion, then I would be taking a huge risk.

I needed to know my role in the war and the awful things I had done. I wasn't ready, I don't think I ever would be, but it was my duty to know. It felt like my life since the war was leading up to this moment, the inevitability that my past would catch up to my present.

I grabbed the potion that would put me into a deep sleep for the next twenty-four hours and choked it down. My eyes fluttered shut before I could set the flask on the nightstand.

It was time to remember.

* * *

**Tuesday, May 5, 1998, 7:00 pm**

"Again!"

Every muscle in her body ached and she did not think she could go on any longer. Hermione was just not cut out for combat. The spars consisted of barely fending off her mentor's attacks, bruises blooming on her arms and legs. Blood trickled down her chin as her body smacked against the mat for the hundredth time.

"Again!" her mentor said. She could hear the desperation in his voice. They both knew the consequences would be awful if she didn't get up.

Groaning, Hermione pushed herself back up. Her arms were shaking as she held up her fists and got into the proper stance. Bellatrix was standing in the doorway, watching them with disapproving eyes. He stepped towards her and they began the never-ending dance. She dodged his first attack but left herself open when she tried to land a punch, earning a kick in the stomach. Somehow, Hermione managed to stay on her feet and blocked his attempt to punch her side. The spar continued over and over again until Bellatrix left. The moment the door slammed shut behind her, her mentor stopped the fight.

"That is enough for today," he said.

Hermione hesitated. "How will I improve if we do not continue?"

"You require strength training, conditioning, and recovery. You will not improve if you do not take care of yourself," her mentor said, walking towards the bench at the far side of the room. He picked up a towel and wiped the sweat from his face. "You are making progress little by little."

"Not fast enough," she said.

"You will be ready by the deadline the Dark Lord has set forth."

She had no choice but to believe him. They both knew what was at stake if she failed the Dark Lord's test. Nothing more was said, each going their separate ways. Hermione had to improve if she wanted to be of use to the Dark Lord.

* * *

**Sunday, May 31, 1998, 6:00 am**

Hermione hooked her leg behind her mentor's left knee and pushed him onto the mat. The sound his body made when it slammed into the mat echoed in the empty room. Her brown eyes widened and she quickly stepped away from him. The blond was still lying on the ground, a look of surprise plastered on his face. It was the first time she had knocked him off his feet. Hermione was proud that her hard work was paying off, but she was scared of retaliation. Would he punish her now? Her mentor got up and walked towards her with his hand extended towards her. She let him grab her hand and was surprised when he shook it firmly.

"It's about time, Granger," he said with a smile. "We will make a warrior out of you yet."

"You're not angry?"

His brow furrowed. "The Dark Lord has ordered me to train you to be one of our best. That is what I intend to do."

She had no response, surprised at the warm feeling in her chest. The other Death Eaters were nothing like her mentor and she didn't understand why he was different. Maybe they were becoming friends? It was a nice thought.

"Thank you, Malfoy."

* * *

**Thursday, June 18, 1998, 7:00 pm**

It did not take long for Hermione and Malfoy to be evenly matched. After training together for so long, she had begun to pick up on the little things. The way that he preferred to be on the offensive than defensive, or how his eyes glanced to the right just before he was about to rush her. He also knew her tells, which made fighting him difficult. But she enjoyed it all the same.

The rest of her time was spent in solitude or magical training and her magic instructor was less forgiving of her mistakes. Rodolphus Lestrange was a cruel man, but she understood the need of his harsh tutelage. Their enemy – the Order of the Phoenix – would show her no mercy. If she were to survive, to contribute to the Cause, then she had to be the best warrior she could be. It was an expectation that she needed to be well versed in combat, dueling, and nonverbal magic before being deployed on missions. Hermione was desperate to prove herself and put all her energy and focus into her training.

"Focus, Granger," Malfoy snapped as he knocked her to the ground.

She grabbed his arms at the last second and pulled him down with her. They tussled on the ground, rolling as each tried to gain the advantage. It all happened so fast. One minute, they were fighting furiously and the next, time stopped. Malfoy was straddling her, his forearm pressing on her throat, her chest heaving as she tried to calm her racing heart. There was a strange look in his grey eyes, almost like he was seeing her for the first time. Hermione leaned up as he moved closer to her. Her eyes fluttered shut when the sound of approaching footsteps made them spring apart.

"The Dark Lord has summoned you," Bellatrix said as she looked at them suspiciously.

"Why didn't he use the mark?" Malfoy asked, his tone conveyed his frustration.

The raven-haired witch huffed. "He wanted me to check on the girl's progress. It is not up to you to question me," Bellatrix said before turning to face Hermione. "You are to report to my husband for both your magical and physical training now that Draco will be away on a mission."

Malfoy finally looked at her, their gaze filled with unspoken words and promise. A promise to resume their moment later, a promise of something more. When Bellatrix and Malfoy left the room, Hermione was filled with a sense of emptiness. She had a preview of what it was like to have feelings for someone and how it would feel when he left.

* * *

**Friday, July 10, 1998, 11:30 am**

The castle was different without Malfoy. Her days were rigidly structured now that Rodolphus was her primary instructor. The other Death Eaters avoided her and she was happy to be left alone. Hermione was desperate to earn her right to go on missions now that nothing was holding her here. She had a bad feeling about Malfoy's absence but she did not ask about his whereabouts. The others would see her interest as a weakness to exploit. Hermione was stuck waiting for a return that might never happen, an unspoken promise broken. Her eyes glanced at the door each time it opened in any room she found herself in, hoping that Malfoy would be there. Each time she was disappointed.

After the third week, he did walk through the door. Hermione had to stop herself from standing up and going to him. There was something different about him. It was in the way he held himself, the power radiating from him, and the facial hair that he had shaved off. His cold eyes swept across the room and when their eyes met, there was no hint of recognition within those beautiful grey eyes.

Her instincts were right. She had lost him.

* * *

**Monday, July 20, 1998, 9:00 pm**

Hermione was in the middle of a duel with Rodolphus when He came for her. The moment He stepped through the door, it was like the air had been sucked out of the room making it difficult to breathe. He did not interrupt and watched their fight from the doorway. This was the moment that she had been training for, to be deemed worthy enough to join the Death Eaters. His presence gave both her and Rodolphus a surge of energy as they lit up the room with their curses, the only sound was their panting breaths as they dodged the incoming flurry. Hermione could feel herself slowing, saw the smirk on Rodolphus' face as he pressed on. The duel was till first blood.

Hermione knew the cost of losing the Dark Lord's test and she was not ready to die. Sweat dripping down her back, she blocked Rodolphus' spells as she tried to recall Malfoy's lessons. She stopped sending curses and instead focused on dodging and analyzing Rodolphus' movements for any weaknesses. Hermione had yet to defeat him but today would be the day. It took ten more minutes before she saw her opening and she sent a slicing curse to his upper torso.

"You are ready for duty," the Dark Lord said. She wasn't sure what she expected when she finally passed the test, but it wasn't the cold appraisal He gave her. "Take her to the dungeons, wipe her, and begin the rehabilitation process."

Four Death Eaters rushed into the room at his words, grabbing her as Hermione fought with all her might against them. They had managed to disarm and overpower her before they dragged her away. The only thing Hermione knew was that she could not go down to the dungeons.

There were rumors that Malfoy had visited the dungeons after his return, that was the reason he was so different now. But her sheer terror as they threw her on the table and restrained her paralyzed her. All Hermione could do was watch as they slowly took everything away from her again.

And she was numb.

* * *

**Wednesday, August 19, 1998, 10:00 pm**

"You have done well. The Dark Lord has given you another mission as a reward," Evan Rosier said, sliding the file towards her. "This is your target. I trust that you can handle it."

"Yes, sir."

"There is one other thing. You will have a partner, Lucius' son. Be careful around him," he advised before adjourning their meeting.

Hermione didn't care who she worked with. Her partners never seemed to last long. The first one had been killed dueling, a stunning spell gone wrong. The last one – Anthony Goldstein – she had to take care of herself. The Order had captured him and he would have given them everything to save his hide. He was despicable. The world was better off without him.

None of her partners could keep up with her but she was optimistic about this one. Lucius Malfoy was part of the Dark Lord's inner circle – his former right hand man – and his son was supposedly more talented than his father was. The youngest Malfoy was rising the ranks at record speed, although Hermione was quickly catching up to him. She was skeptical but she would give this Draco Malfoy a chance (or maybe get rid of him too if he proved to be annoying).

* * *

**Thursday, August 27, 1998, 6:00 pm**

Hermione understood the rumors and whispers about Draco Malfoy the first time she set eyes on him. He was a pretty boy with white-blonde hair, alabaster skin, and a fit physique. He was powerful, it was obvious in the way he held himself and how easily he wielded his magic. His wand was an extension of him, an afterthought. And he was intelligent, the way that his grey eyes scanned the room and his choice of words when he talked. She understood why the Death Eaters worried that their wives would stray when he was in the room and why the female Death Eaters were clamoring to go on missions with him.

She read over the file for the hundredth time. The target was a beautiful young woman, her age, and had a promising future ahead of her. That was the reason the Dark Lord wanted to get rid of her because Cho Chang was creating a fuss representing Order members. She was a gifted lawyer and she was winning her cases. The Dark Lord wanted her gone.

"Are you going to keep reading that or can we start our mission?" Draco snapped.

Hermione set the file on fire, the contents had been committed to memory days ago, and stood up. Rolling her eyes at his comment, she apparated to their required location and he followed seconds later, cursing. They had appeared in a back alley, the night sky plunging it into darkness. It was the perfect place to wait, hidden in the shadows apart from the smell of rotting meat that was coming from the dumpster.

Lovely.

"They just finished their appetizer, we are going to be here forever," Draco grumbled.

Chang was meeting up with one of her clients, Kingsley Shacklebolt. He was a suspected Order member but there had been no conclusive evidence to prove his allegiance to the rebels. They were laughing at something; Chang's dainty hand was covering her mouth as Shacklebolt shook his head at her. Draco's observation was accurate. Hermione transfigured a rock into a chair and made herself comfortable, watching Malfoy do the same.

He didn't try to fill the silence like her past partners had, a welcome relief. She preferred quiet solitude, it was the only time where she could just think. Hermione had never been given a mission of this importance and it made her uneasy. The Dark Lord was testing her again. He did that every once in awhile to see how far he could push her, proving how loyal she was to the Cause. Hermione wondered how long it would take for Him to trust her. It was a silly thought. The Dark Lord didn't trust anyone.

"They're on the move," Malfoy said an hour and a half later.

Hermione adjusted her white mask before they both stood and strode out onto the street. Everything happened in the blink of an eye. Screams pierced the air as people caught sight of them, running off the streets as fast as they could. Before Chang or Shacklebolt could react, Hermione raised her wand and without a word, a jet of blinding green light escaped and hit Chang in the chest.

The Dark Lord had been very clear that Hermione was the one to deal the killing blow. Shacklebolt was fast, his wand out before she could see it. She didn't see the color, but she felt the curse as it struck the side of her stomach. Her vision was blurring and the next thing she knew, she was in a room she didn't recognize, Malfoy standing over her and his wand was pointed at her. She felt his magic heal her, saw its golden glow as it enveloped her before the darkness took her.

* * *

**Friday, September 18, 1998, 11:00 pm**

Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger were the definition of the perfect partnership. They were effective, powerful, and successful. Missions that would take the average Death Eater three days were completed in one. They were whispered about among the rookies – an ideal to strive for – while the senior members watched them enviously. It was known that Draco and Hermione would become part of the inner circle any day.

Hermione was pleased with her partner. After he saved her life from Shacklebolt's vicious curse, she was willing to give him a chance. They were given mission after mission and their trust in each other grew each time they were successful. They had found a strong match in each other intellectually, their personalities complemented, and their magical abilities were ever growing. She was pleased that she could serve their Cause so well.

"It took you long enough," Draco said when she reached their rendezvous point. "I thought I was going to have to go back there and drag your sorry ass out."

She rolled her eyes and glanced at her watch. "Stop being such a princess. I'm one minute late and last time, I had to save your sorry ass."

He didn't reply, his cheeks tinged with pink. They made their way through winding streets and alleys until they reached the apparition point. Hermione was about to apparate when he grabbed her arm. "Come on, let's watch our hard work pay off."

"We were ordered to return after we were finished."

"We are ahead of schedule and we won't stay for too long. I'm getting cabin fever staying in that castle. This is the first mission in weeks," Draco pleaded and she found herself agreeing.

The Dark Lord had implemented a new rule. Only those permitted could leave the castle until further notice. They were pushing their luck by staying behind longer than necessary, but Hermione found that she had trouble denying her partner.

Draco took her hand and apparated her to a rooftop. The view was incredible. The skyline was impressive, the lights glowing in the night sky, and the sound of cars driving on the streets below. It was only when she went to cast a warming charm that she realized that he was still holding her hand. A smile twitched at the edge of her lips.

"How did you find this place?"

He shrugged. "I used this rooftop on one of my missions. I come back here to clear my head every once in awhile. The Dark Lord has prevented me from coming here since the travel restriction."

"The Order should not have known about that last safe house. I understand His frustration and I don't mind giving up my freedom if it helps us win this war," Hermione said.

"How can you be so loyal to the Cause? You accept His orders without question," Draco asked.

She looked at him to answer and didn't realize how close they were standing to each other. She could see the blue specks in his slate eyes, the curl of his eyelashes, and her breath hitched when he leaned towards her. "The world is chaos. Muggles threaten our existence and it is our duty to put our country back to the way it should be."

Draco looked at her with wonder. "You truly believe in the Cause," he said. Before she could ask him what he meant, his mouth caught hers. His lips were slightly chapped as they moved against hers. He tasted of firewhiskey and the attraction grew tenfold as she realized how forbidden this union would be. He pulled her closer as her hands went under his shirt – The sound of an explosion blasted the air, making the buildings tremble with its force.

"We're missing it," Hermione said in between kisses.

"I don't care," Draco said, his hand snaking through her wild curls.

But they separated shortly after, not wanting to be punished for lingering out of bounds. They both walked with a little bounce in their steps when they returned home, their eyes hiding a secret that could never be discovered.

* * *

**Monday, September 28, 1998, 8:00 pm**

Draco and Hermione were summoned by the Dark Lord but when they reached his chambers, they found he was already occupied. The door was slightly ajar, the sound of voices trickling into the hallway. Hermione looked at Draco to see what they should do but rolled her eyes when he took a step closer. Ever since they acted on their feelings for each other, Draco had grown a little more reckless.

"That _thing_ cannot join the inner circle, my Lord. Allow Draco entry, but do not let such filth join our ranks," Bellatrix said, her disgust made goosebumps appear on Hermione's arms.

"Are you questioning my judgment?" The Dark Lord's voice was low, with that dangerous quality that meant he was close to snapping.

Bellatrix seemed to recognize this as well. "No, my Lord. I know that they have been successful but the fact remains that Hermione is a mudblood. She is everything we are fighting to eliminate, no matter how effective of a weapon she has become."

Hermione's face paled, the hallway was closing in on her, and it was getting harder and harder to breathe. Bellatrix had to be lying, there was no way that she was a mudblood. But the Dark Lord had confirmed it, leaving no room for misinterpretation. Hermione understood why the other Death Eaters avoided her, some of the comments directed at her. It was like she was seeing her life clearly for the first time and she hated it. She turned to Draco but found that he backing away from her, getting further and further out of reach.

"She will be the exception to the rule. We cannot allow the Order to possess her again. She has changed the tide of this war and will join the inner circle. The person that reveals this information to Hermione will be dealt with permanently," the Dark Lord threatened.

* * *

**Tuesday, October 6, 1998, 9:00 pm**

Since the revelation, things between Hermione and Draco had changed. He no longer looked her in the eye, avoided touching her unless it was necessary. Their blossoming romance had come to a grounding halt but they were still forced to work together despite the growing tension. Several times she thought about asking for a new partner, but too many questions would be asked if she did.

Hermione felt lost. She didn't know how to process the information they had overheard. It seemed impossible that she was a mudblood. If she was, then Hermione's existence went against every one of the Dark Lord's beliefs. She was smart, beautiful, and clean, the opposite of what a mudblood was. Hermione spent most of her days in denial, it was easier than facing the truth. The only thing that Draco and Hermione agreed on was pretending they had never heard the Dark Lord and Bellatrix's conversation.

She was about to apparate back to the castle after another successful mission when Draco grabbed her arm and spirited her away. It took a couple seconds after they landed for her to place their whereabouts. It was the rooftop where they had finally acted on their feelings and she felt her anger rise that he would bring her back here. Draco was pacing, a sign that he was deeply troubled about something.

"We should end this charade and join the Order," he said, breaking the silence.

Hermione shook her head, thinking she was hallucinating but Draco was serious. "End this charade and join the Order? Have you lost your mind? And since when is it we?"

"Don't be stupid, it's always been us together," he said standing in front of her. "My whole world came crashing down the moment I found out the woman I love is a muggleborn. Was I supposed to jump for joy at the news? I needed time to process it and come up with a plan. Were you going to continue to delude yourself into thinking we were fighting for the right cause?"

"You love me?"

Draco rolled his eyes. "Of course, I love you. You are the single most frustrating, intelligent, beautiful woman that I know," he said drawing her into a hug. "You're in danger and we need to find a way to save you."

Her anger dissipated as soon as his arms were wrapped around her. She allowed herself to fall apart for the first time since she discovered the truth. Draco was right, she was in danger. The Dark Lord had lied about everything. The reason behind her amnesia, her identity, and the Cause. She honestly believed He had saved her and given her a chance, but none of it was true.

Draco held her until her sobs and shaking slowed, then stopped completely. He pressed his lips against the top of her head. "We both know that we have been fighting on the wrong side of this war. I have a contact that might be able to help connect us to the Order. What do you say?"

"Let's end this fucking war," Hermione said pulling back, her eyes filled with the promise of revenge.

* * *

**Friday, October 23, 1998, 1:00 pm**

"I don't have a good feeling about this," Hermione said for the millionth time.

"We have been over the plan again and again. It's going to work," Draco said. "Harry Potter himself has stated that we will not be harmed if we abide by the agreement."

She shifted her weight from one foot to the other. "I know, I just… Be careful. I don't know what I would do without you."

"You would be fine," he said, grabbing her hand.

She pressed a light kiss on the back of his hand as they waited. She didn't voice her concern again, but the unease that she felt grew with every second that passed. They were risking everything and the consequences – it was best not to dwell on that.

A man carrying a bouquet of lilies in his left hand and a newspaper in his right walked past them. They counted to thirty before falling into step behind Neville Longbottom and followed him through the park. They stayed five steps behind him, talking about nonsense as they acted out the part of a doting couple. Longbottom did not look back to see if they were following and Hermione felt her nerves go into overdrive. She wished that they were at the Order safe house, out of harm's way. It wasn't until they reached the woods at the edge of the muggle park that Longbottom stopped and turned towards them.

"Hermione, I never thought I would see you again," he said, hugging her tightly before releasing her. Longbottom dug around in his pocket before producing a piece of paper, oblivious to Hermione's confusion. "Memorize this address."

Draco took the paper, glanced at the address and was about to hand it to Hermione when everything went to shit. Six Death Eaters emerged from behind the trees, curses flying towards them. Hermione and Draco jumped for cover while Longbottom returned fire. How were they discovered? The two groups dueled, but the Death Eaters had the advantage. One minute, she was fighting beside Draco, the next, they were separated.

There were only three Death Eaters left when she felt the curse hit her back. She only had time to say "I love you" before she was immobilized, force to watch as Draco tried to rush towards her. Longbottom grabbed her love at the last second, a sad look in his eye as they disappeared leaving her behind.

"Well if it isn't the little mudblood herself. You should tell Draco that his encryption spell is outdated," Leonard Rosier said, smirking. "It's back to the dungeons with you."

Fear washed over her as they apparated her back to the castle. At least Draco was safe, she could rest easier knowing that. Bellatrix met Rosier at the door and she led Hermione's floating body down the familiar hallway, down the stairs, and placed her roughly on the metal table. Hermione recognized the place and felt a chill at the evil of this room. She sent a last mental 'I love you' to Draco before the electrocution began.

Everything faded away.

And she was numb.

* * *

**Wednesday, November 11, 1998**

Hermione was the only Death Eater that operated alone. The Dark Lord told her that she was more effective as a solitary soldier and that the other followers would only slow her down. There was something in his voice that betrayed his spoken words – a hint of anger – but she did not question it. Hermione prided herself on being a good soldier and it was not a soldier's job to question their commander.

Her mission was simple. Kill Robert Selwyn, a captured Death Eater, before he had a chance to betray the Dark Lord. It was easier said than done. He was being held in a safe house in the country with two Order members guarding him at all times. Hermione crouched behind a thatch of branches as she inspected the cabin. It was a small wooden cottage that had fallen on hard times. The window on the left was cracked and the white paint on the door was peeling.

Hermione waved her wand and was relieved to see that there were indeed only two members. Selwyn was strapped to a chair in the kitchen near the back of the cabin. She almost jumped when the front door burst open and the two Order members stepped out of the house, yelling at each other. It was an unspoken rule that the Dark Lord wanted as many Order members taken out as possible.

Seizing her good fortune, she sprang out in the open and cast the Killing Curse at the man with the black hair. His brown eyes widened in shock as his body dropped to the ground. The blond turned around and dodged the green curse. Hermione swore and started running towards the cabin, dodging the spells sent her way. She sent killing curse after curse, but the man skillfully avoided them. The Order member reached the cabin before her, the only obstacle remaining between her and her target. His slicing curse hit its mark, the force of it knocking her wand out of her hand.

"Hermione, stop! I don't want to hurt you."

" _Expelliarmus!_ " she yelled, waving her hand. His wand flew out of his hand and into hers. Hermione stashed it into her wand holster, leaping towards him, her punch landing on his stomach.

"What have they done to you?" the stranger asked, his voice horrified as he raised an arm to block her next punch. "It's me, Draco!"

"Your tricks won't work on me. I will not be deceived," Hermione said.

She was about to punch him again, but at the last second, swept her legs under his, knocking him to the ground. Hermione grabbed his wand to deliver the killing blow when she noticed that his wand had split at some point during the fight. Her time was running out. Slamming her foot on his face, she knocked him out. Running into the cabin, she made her way to the kitchen. Selwyn's eyes widened when he saw her.

"Please, I didn't tell them anything!"

Hermione grabbed the knife off the counter and smiled coldly. "The Dark Lord sends his regards."

Once the deed was done, she apparated back to the castle to deliver her report to the Dark Lord. He was pacing in his chambers when she arrived and Hermione immediately knelt in front of him. He walked towards her and pushed her chin up. She felt him use Legilimency as he peered through the open book that was her mind. She felt his anger when he saw her fight the blond Order member but laughed when she watched Selwyn's death.

"Rise my child. You have done well."

She stood up. "Would it not have been more effective for me to rescue Selwyn?"

"Everyone knows the cost of capture," the Dark Lord said dismissively. "Now what do I do with you? You have been a loyal, eager servant but I fear that Draco has tainted you with this most recent run-in. We finally got your calibration right and I would hate to break you again, only to build you back up."

"My Lord?"

He pulled out his wand, his red eyes watching her. "You are too perfect to risk a recalibration. _Obliviate_."

"I am sorry, my Lord, did you summon me?" Hermione asked, her mind hazy.

"You just gave me a most pleasing mission report. You will change the tide of this war," the Dark Lord said before dismissing her.

* * *

**Tuesday, November 24, 1998, 4:00 pm**

The battle raged around her, the world lit up with various shades of the rainbow. Hermione had tuned out the cries, the yells, the fury and grief as soon as the fight began. There was no room for distractions, not today. The mission she was designed for had finally arrived and she would not disappoint the Dark Lord in his hour of need. She returned the curses that were aimed at her as she searched for her target in the chaos of battle. The big question was: Where would the Boy-Who-Lived be right now?

Five spells were sent in her direction. Hermione dove to the ground, skinning her knees, dirt smeared on her face. She quickly popped back up and started running, dodging the spells coming her way. She would not win a battle against five people. Only the Dark Lord had that much power. It took an eternity before she found him. He had just killed Rodolphus Lestrange, a man she had only seen in passing. Hermione pushed away her baffling sadness at the death and stepped into his line of sight.

"Harry Potter. I have heard so much about you," she said with a smile. Hermione took off her white mask, a direct order from the Dark Lord.

Potter's head snapped up when he heard her voice. "Draco told me that you were still alive. I was scared to believe him but you're really here."

"I don't know what you're talking about," she said, pointing her wand at him. "I don't know you."

His eyes widened when he saw the green light heading towards him and he dodged it. "It's me, Harry. Your best friend."

"I have never seen you before," Hermione said sending curse after curse at him. He blocked each one and did not try to engage her in a fight. It was frustrating, but she would not let the Dark Lord down.

"You are the smartest witch I know. You know just as well as I do that something doesn't add up. Why don't you remember your past?" Harry asked, panting as her flurry of spells increased.

Her eyes widened, but she pushed on. "Because you tortured me within an inch of my life. If it weren't for the Dark Lord, then I would be dead right now."

"That's convenient for him. If you were the good guys, then why do you kill?"

"This is war, not a fairytale," Hermione said dodging a stray spell.

"Watch out!" Harry said throwing himself at her and pulling her to the ground just in time for her to see the green spell that sailed through the air. That act alone made her pause. Here was the man that had supposedly played a part in her torture, the same man who had just saved her life. "I'm not going to fight you, Hermione. You're my best friend, you're the reason that I'm fighting this war so that you can have a place in the world. Do whatever you need to do."

He held out his wand for her to take. Her heart was pounding in her chest as she tried to make sense out of this situation. A jolt to her head made her eyes fly shut as she remembered meeting a raven-haired boy with broken glasses on a train and the genuine smile he sent her way when she fixed them for him. The sound of stone exploding near them brought her back to reality. They were in the midst of a battle and if they weren't careful, they would both be killed.

"I don't understand what's going on," she admitted, pushing his offered wand away. "I will not complete the mission. You have brought up questions that I need answers to."

Harry seemed to understand what she meant. "Go. We will meet again."

Hermione nodded before using her emergency portkey, disappearing from the battle.

* * *

**Saturday, May 20, 2000, 2:00 pm**

"Shit! Hermione, wake up!" a voice said urgently. "What did you do?"

Someone was shaking me forcefully, which did nothing to help my splitting headache. My mind was hazy, the clutches of sleep difficult to shake. It took me a moment to gather my wits, to remember that I was not in the middle of a battle. I was in the middle of a mission as an Unspeakable. With Draco Malfoy. My childhood nemesis, my mentor, my Death Eater partner, the love of my life, my enemy, my Unspeakable partner.

My eyes flew open and I wrenched myself out of his grasp. He must have just come back from his outing with Blaise and Theo, his disguise still in place. "When were you going to tell me?"

"What are you talking about?" he asked. When his eyes met mine, realization dawned on him. "Fuck."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These chapters just keep growing, I swear. This was the weirdest chapter I have ever written. How many times have Draco and Hermione met for the 'first' time? It's also strangely fun writing about brainwashed characters. Let me know your thoughts :).
> 
> I also have been really active on tumblr, so if you want updates on my story progress, check out my account there (same username). Let me know your thoughts on this wild chapter :).


	7. Chapter 7

**Saturday, May 20, 2000, 2:03 pm**

The silence stretched between us. Draco’s forehead was creased, his left hand twitched, something he did when he was stressed. That observation was hard to swallow, something I wouldn’t have known before regaining my memories. I had learned over a year of information in the span of a day, my mind was straining against the load. The past few weeks now made sense, the reason that I had fallen fast for Draco, the strange feelings that crept up on me during the mission. But knowing this did nothing to quell the anger, hurt, anxiety, and confusion that I felt now that I knew my past. I got out of bed, needing to move, to let the information sink in.

“What happened?” he asked.

I ignored the disappointment that I felt at his response. It’s not like I wanted a declaration of love, but with the memories still fresh in my mind, I needed something to ground me back to the present. I needed to feel like I wasn’t losing my mind. That our history was real and not a figment of my imagination.

“My missing memories have returned. Or most of them at least.”

Draco looked away. “I see.”

“Why didn’t you tell me about our… history?” I asked.

“What was I supposed to say?”

“I don’t know,” I said, my temper flaring. “Maybe that you trained me, that we were partners, or maybe that we were in love? Or were you just going to pretend that it didn’t happen?”

He took a step towards me before turning around abruptly, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I waited years for you to remember, for you to come back to me. So yes, I was going to pretend it didn’t happen. Would you have believed me if I told you? I was barely able to believe what I had gone through.”

“Who are you to make those decisions for me?” I said, walking up to him and forcing him to face me. “This is my life that we’re talking about. After the war, I was lost. I didn’t understand what had happened to me. I was different, a stranger to myself, and the one person that would have understood what that felt like, decided not to tell me. Left me alone to figure it out.”

“Do you think it was easy? You have been within an arm’s reach this entire mission and you acted like you hated me. I wrestled with the decision to tell you, but I thought you could have a fresh start. You could leave the darkness behind and move on. At least one of us could be happy,” Draco said, his voice getting louder.

I shoved him. “Don’t give me that bullshit excuse. Have you seen me move on with my life? I have been a ghost roaming around, trying to find a reason to exist. You have a life now, you have my old friends, you have everything.”

Draco grabbed my arms and pulled me closer. My chest was heaving as I tried to remember to breathe. I tried to resist but he held on tighter. This act brought me back to that rooftop, our oasis during a war we both did not want to be a part of. My heart ached as I remembered how in love we had been, how many times we had come together, been forced apart, only to find our way back to each other. Only time would tell how our story would end this time.

“I don’t have everything,” he said quietly. “I don’t have you.”

My breath caught as he started leaning in, my eyes fluttering closed. The sound of tapping at the window broke the mood, the awkwardness returned as we both backed away from each other. I was both irritated and relieved by the interruption. Draco went to the window to let the owl in and read the letter.

“This is a lead on the encryption stone. There’s a man that’s in town only for tonight that might have the information we’re looking for,” he said, his voice businesslike.

“You should check it out. I think I need a moment to let everything sink in and I need to talk to Harry.”

“I’ll let you know what I find out. We can resume our conversation tonight,” Draco said, but it sounded more like a question. I put on my best fake smile and nodded.

* * *

**Saturday, May 20, 2000, 4:00 pm**

I didn’t bother knocking and walked into Grimmauld Place. At this time, Ginny would be at work and it was Andromeda’s week with Teddy. Despite my reluctance to resume my friendship with Harry, I had kept tabs on him since the war. I used to tell myself that it was to successfully avoid him. The real reason was that I wanted to make sure that he was safe.

Harry was bent over the kitchen table reading over a document, a frown on his lips. He looked up at me, the sunlight glinting off his glasses as he quickly stood up. “Hermione. What are you doing here? Not that you aren’t welcome of course, but this is rather unexpected.”

“Why didn’t you tell me about my time with the Dark Lord?”

“Voldemort,” he corrected. “Did Draco tell you?”

I sighed. “No, he didn’t tell me. That’s the thing about secrets, they always come out eventually. Were you ever going to tell me about my past with Draco? Or that I was going to defect to the Order?”

“Let’s go to the sitting room. I can get us a drink and we can talk about it.”

“Talk about how you hid the truth from me? This is not one of those ‘let’s sit down and talk about it’ moments. I trusted you, Harry. When I was at my most vulnerable and lost, I trusted you,” I said, my voice cracking as I tried to blink away my tears.

“It’s not that simple. No one knew if you would regain your memories. I wanted to tell you, but Draco said that we shouldn’t. He knew what you had been through, having gone through it himself, and I trusted his judgment.”

I looked away from him, trying to swallow the lump in my throat. “This whole time I thought that I was evil. I have questioned my morals, hated myself for turning into the person that I became after the war. I agonized over the fact that I was turned. Do you know what a relief it would have been to know that I tried to escape? That I fought off the Dark Lord’s brainwashing and he had to torture me back into submission several times? That I was still on some level good?”

Harry didn’t say anything. I could hear the clock down the hall, a car driving past the house, and I both loved and resented that he had a normal life now. He was engaged, had a godson, and worked a regular job. His home was filled pictures of his life, decorations that Ginny had picked, and he looked happy. Harry had sacrificed so much, had such a difficult life and he deserved this, so why did I resent him?

Because somewhere along the way, I was left behind.

I had been at this man’s side since we were eleven years old. I had faced trolls, Death Eaters, and torture for him. When the world was falling apart, we had each other. I stared at my brother, my family in every way that mattered, and I felt betrayed. I could barely breathe again, a heaviness had set in my chest, as I realized that the person that I had followed into the war, the person that I trusted when I didn’t know who I was, had kept me in the dark.

“The healers said that it was unlikely that you would ever regain your memories. We thought that you would be able to heal, to move on if you didn’t remember,” he said, the pain that I felt was reflected in his green eyes.

“I killed people, Harry. Murdered them in cold blood. That kind of darkness doesn’t go away, regardless of whether my mind remembered it or not,” I said, remembering Robert Selwyn pleading for his life as I took it. I had to close my eyes to shut out the gory memory. “Do you remember how angry you used to get when Professor Dumbledore hid things from you? You just did the same thing to me.”

I looked at the man in front of me. Our savior. The Boy-Who-Won. My brother. I felt like I was treading water, but the current was getting stronger and no matter how much I tried to stay in control, it was useless. The river was taking me along for a ride, exhaustion settling in my bones as I kept trying to fight my way out of it.

There was nothing left to say, so I left.

* * *

**Tuesday, May 23, 2000, 1:00 pm**

Closing my eyes, I rested my head against the cold glass. The overcast sky and the light rain pattering on the window matched my mood. I pulled the blanket tighter around myself as I stared at the grey outside world. After my conversations with both Draco and Harry, I needed space.

Instead of returning home, I decided to stay at my safe house. No one knew this place existed. It was my backup plan if everything went to shit. I had written a short note to Draco telling him that I needed time to process. I felt guilty for leaving the mission, but I needed to take a moment for myself. The faint headache I had upon waking up was still there, a dull ache in the back of my skull.

I didn’t know what to do. I always thought that I would be able to move on with my life once I remembered everything. Instead, I was left with more questions and self-loathing. I had wanted to be a Death Eater, felt pleased when I had joined the ranks and believed in their cause. The same cause that meant the extinction of muggles and muggleborns, my extinction. It wasn’t me, but at the same time, it was. I had tortured and killed for the Dark Lord. People that I had known, grown up with, worked with. What was I supposed to do with that? How does one atone for such grotesque crimes?

I spent the rest of the night grieving for the lives that I had stolen, for those who were robbed of a future.

* * *

**Thursday, May 25, 2000, 11:00 am**

The best thing about mornings is that the problems that seemed dire in the night, didn’t feel so hopeless in the daylight. For the first time since I woke up with my memories, I showered, got dressed, and ate breakfast like a functional human. I pulled out Persuasion by Jane Austen and fell into a world so different but so similar to the one that I lived in. The headache that had plagued me the past few days had retreated so that it was only a twinge. It wasn’t until I got halfway through the book that I set it down and let my thoughts wander to the discoveries that I had made this past week.

I wished that I could go back in time. I had been such a naïve, innocent, bossy little know-it-all. Back at Hogwarts, I thought I knew what I was getting into. I falsely believed that I was prepared to go to war, that I knew what that term meant. But I had been so wrong. We were children playing at being grownups, rushing into adulthood faster than we needed to. There was no glory in war. Only blood, sweat, and decay. If I could talk to the younger version of myself, I would tell her to slow down. Enjoy every minute.

It wasn’t until I walked past a mirror that I realized that I still looked like Lyra. I rummaged through my bag and downed the potion that would return my features. I couldn’t remember the last time I looked like myself. I had thrown myself into work after the war, wearing identity after identity, pretending to be someone else. Strangely, I missed looking like myself. My wavy hair, my brown eyes, my scars.

I was tired of carrying around my emotional baggage, of feeling guilty, helpless, and shame. I needed a break. Maybe it was time that I acted like a normal girl in her twenties.

* * *

**Friday, May 26, 2000, 11:00 pm**

The music blared from the speakers, the whole place was packed with people. This world was so unlike anything I was familiar with. There was a couple making out behind a pillar, the guy’s hands inching lower and lower. Girls stood around in groups, looking around the room for prospects. The guys seemed oblivious to this, in the middle of playing pool. I was surrounded by people my age, but I felt so separated from them. They had no care in the world, their lives untouched by war. I was jealous, the familiar ‘Why did I have to suffer?’ thought made its appearance.

Shaking my head, I walked to the bar and ordered a drink. I sipped it wondering what possessed me to come to a club of all places. I could feel eyes on me, probably wondering why I was alone. I felt the need to hide, to leave. It was funny because when I was on a mission, I was more confident, brave. Even now I could distinguish which groups would welcome a newcomer and which ones would shun me if I dared approach.

Fuck it.

I set my empty glass down and made my way to the dancefloor. I forced my way through the crowd until I found a free spot, the bodies packed together as we waited for the next song to play. Closing my eyes, I let the beginning lines of the song carry me away. Tonight, I was just an ordinary girl having fun.

My hips followed the beat, my arms in the air, as I danced for hours. The dance floor was lit up in shades of blue, purple, and pink. It felt like the whole club was trying to fit into this small area. I wasn’t sure if my shirt was soaked with my own sweat or with someone else’s. Despite this, I was having a blast. It felt wrong and irresponsible, but I ignored those thoughts. It was fun jumping around with everyone, singing along to the catchy songs.

The song slowed for a moment, giving me a chance to catch my breath. Everything around me became sharper, clearer, more colorful. It was like life stopped for a second and we were all connected, all part of something. Then the beat sped up and we started jumping like spirits possessed. I found myself in the middle of a group of girls. We started laughing as we danced like fools, without a care in the world. I kept moving, kept dancing because I knew that the moment I stopped, everything would catch up to me again. And I wasn’t ready yet.

* * *

**Saturday, May 27, 2000, 2:30 am**

I stumbled into my safe house giggling. Tonight was everything I needed and more. I couldn’t remember ever feeling that free, ignoring my worries for a few hours. My feet ached, my makeup was smeared, but I was _happy_. I walked to the kitchen and poured myself a glass of water.

This was the first time that I had let myself glimpse a life outside of the war, away from being an Unspeakable. I was surprised that I felt recharged, that I had could have fun for a night. After draining my glass, I retreated to my bedroom.

I knew this was temporary. I needed to return to the mission. The new Death Eaters were threatening this world again and I would play my part in defending it. But this was the first time that I thought about my future. After this mission was complete, what did I want? Would I continue to be an Unspeakable? What would my life look like in five years? Ten?

But first thing, first. I had a mission to complete. Tomorrow. Tonight, I would enjoy this last night of freedom and face to music in the morning.

* * *

**Thursday, December 24, 1998, 4:00 pm**

Hermione found him at Dumbledore’s grave. His hands were thrust into his pockets, his hair messier than the last time she had seen him. She had not expected to run into him here and was about to leave when he started speaking.

“The war is over.”

She released the breath she had been holding. “I know.”

“Then why haven’t you come home?” Harry asked, continuing to face the snow-covered grave.

“Home,” the word tasted foreign in her mouth. “I don’t have a home.”

Where was her home now that the Dark Lord was gone? Who was she now that she was no longer a soldier? Migraines had become a familiar friend, making everything hazy. Her time with the Dark Lord was becoming blurred, her only intact memory was when she ran into Harry on the battlefield. It seemed like the more she tried to hold on to them, the faster the memories slipped away.

He turned to face her, his green eyes filled with emotions she didn’t recognize. He looked like he was on the verge of saying something but was trying to contain himself. Hermione didn’t know how much time passed as they regarded each other silently. Finally, Harry approached her slowly like she was about to bolt at any moment, the snow crunching under his feet.

“I am so sorry for what you went through. When you were gone, it was like part of me was missing too,” he said. “I know that you’re having trouble with your memories. I want to help if you’ll let me?”

The raven-haired man held out his arm and she hesitated. Hermione didn’t know him. He was the enemy. But he had saved her and now he wanted to help her. What did he have to gain? Part of her was tempted by the offer. She had spent the past few weeks trying to piece together her past, but where do you start when you have no memory.

“You can trust me,” Harry said.

With a shaking hand, Hermione clasped his arm. The moment their skin made contact, memories of a girl with bushy brown hair and a boy with messy black hair with round spectacles came rushing forward. They were in the meal hall, the library, laughing, and hugging. She could barely keep track of the flickering memories, but she knew that she had made the right decision.

Enemy or not, this man was the start of everything and Hermione intended to find out more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Let me know your thoughts :).


	8. Chapter 8

**Sunday, May 7, 2000, 9:00 am**

The muggle street was quiet and every step that took me closer to the house filled me with dread. I had a chance to start over, to try to move on from my past. Even now as I caught sight of the modest home, I could keep walking and disappear without a trace. The peace that I had found at my safe house was slipping away. I tried to hold onto it, to feel certain of the decision I was making. There were lives at stake, innocents to protect, and people that needed to be stopped. It was the right thing to do. Harry would make this choice without question.

But, I knew the cost. I would be going head to head with the darkness that I had finally overcome and I knew I wasn't ready. I wasn't sure that I ever would be if I was being honest. Once the darkness claimed a part of you, it never left. It still lived inside of you, biding its time for an opportunity to rise again. This mission hit too close to home and would give it plenty of opportunities, but it was a gamble that I would have to take.

Too caught up in my thoughts, I almost ran into a couple. I apologized profusely to which the man nodded but did nothing to soothe the woman. She lifted her chin and strutted off, the man hurrying to catch up. I watched the pair until they turned left the next block and walked out of sight. That couple was ill-matched if that interaction was anything to go by.

Shaking my head, I walked up the pathway, stepped on the creaky steps and grabbed the cold, brass door knob. I tried to turn it but it wouldn't budge. Furrowing my brow, I tried again without any success. I was keyed into the wards but no matter what I did, I was rejected at every turn. I collapsed in front of the door and decided to wait until Draco came home.

I caught sight of the couple again, this time their heads bent together. I was about to look away when I saw the man unconsciously grab his wand holster as he walked past me. A million thoughts rushed through my head. This _couple_ was watching me, but on whose orders? The new Death Eaters? That didn't sound right. It wasn't their MO and what would have tipped them off? The other answer was the Head Unspeakable. Due to the type of work we do, he kept a tight leash on his agents and my disappearance would have worried him.

And if the Head Unspeakable knew, then Draco had told him.

I would have to deal with my partner later. The _couple_ was still out of sight. I jumped up and made my way to the back of the house. As soon closed the gate behind me, I pulled out my wand and apparated. I knew the sound would alert my pursuers and I chose my location accordingly. The moment my feet touched the ground, I was already adjusting as many facial features as I could. I could only risk changing the color of my skin, my hair, and my eyes. When I was finished, I stepped out onto the street and started making my way to the Leaky Cauldron.

People knocked into me as I fought my way through the crowd. Why was Diagon Alley so busy? I was tempted to look back, to see if my pursuers had followed me. It would be a terrible idea, a rookie mistake. Clenching my fists, I resisted the urge and pushed myself forward.

I almost sighed in relief when I entered the Leaky Cauldron. The smell of alcohol, bad decisions, and smoke greeted me, putting me at ease. A crowd in the far left corner were banging the table, tossing coins into a cup and placing wagers. It was an odd sight at nine in the morning. I shook my head at the distraction and tried to focus. I was still in danger. I nodded at Tom and tossed coins into the jar next to the fireplace. Grabbing a handful of powder, I whispered my destination and stepped into the green flames.

* * *

**Sunday, May 28, 2000, 6:00 pm**

"Dare I ask?" Pansy quirked an eyebrow at my altered appearance.

I waved my wand and returned my appearance to Lyra's. "I thought I was being followed."

"Why would someone follow _you_?"

There was something in her voice that didn't sit well with me. She was wearing a silk purple robe, her raven hair pinned back, looking like I had interrupted something. Granted, I had shown up unexpectedly.

I shrugged my shoulders. "I probably overreacted but you can't be too careful."

"Care to tell me where you've been the past week?"

This part of the conversation was what my participation in the mission hinged on. I wasn't sure what Draco had said and if I contradicted him, I would be putting him in jeopardy. I was pissed at him but that didn't mean that I wanted him dead. What would he have said to explain my absence?

"I had to clear my head. Why do you care?"

Pansy huffed. "The Day is soon approaching and you went off the grid. How do I know you're not the mole?"

"How could I be? You haven't included me in anything."

The silence between us was rife with tension and accusation. Her manicured nails were tapping her arms as she considered my words. My jaw tensed, my mind running through every escape scenario if she didn't believe me. Did I make the right decision by acting frustrated? Should I have played on our friendship?

"Fine. You have a point," she said. "What are you doing here?"

"Edward and I aren't really speaking right now and I didn't know where else to turn."

Pansy sighed. "Just because you look pathetic right now, but I'm not getting involved in your marital issues anymore."

I nodded and took off my shoes and hung up my cloak. Pansy headed into the kitchen leaving me to inspect her sitting room. There wasn't a single thing out of place and I almost felt like I was imposing on the order of the room with my presence. I took a seat on the couch and thought I heard glass clinking in the next room over. It wasn't until a few minutes passed that I realized this room had none of Pansy's personality. Although it had nicer things, it looked exactly like the Head Unspeakable's office.

The raven-haired witch entered the room and set down a tea set on the table. I watched as she added sugar to her tea and waited until she finished before grabbing my own cup. I could tell there was something that she wanted to say. My experience taught me that it was best to let the other person broach the subject on their own terms and I was rewarded for my patience.

"You were right. We wanted Edward to join our cause because of his connections and resources. Your initiation into the group was a formality."

"Why are you telling me this?"

Pansy set down her cup. "I think that we made a mistake overlooking you."

"It has been difficult watching you fawn over my husband while ignoring me," I said tentatively.

"Do you truly believe in the cause? Or do you support it because your husband does?"

I couldn't help myself, I laughed. Once I saw the offended look on her face, I started laughing even harder. Pansy was trying so hard to act like the tough guy, to emulate her parents. It reminded me of how innocent Draco's generation was regarding what the Death Eaters did and how the Dark Lord treated his followers (Draco and I were the exceptions, as we were both well informed).

"I'm sorry, your questions reminded me of how little you know me," I said, trying to calm the last of my giggles. "I am not vocal about my views because that is inviting disaster to my doorstep. But make no mistake, I'm no sympathizer. Mudbloods have done more harm than good. The fact that they walk around thinking they are superior to us is an insult to our ancestors. They take their magic for granted, feel special, and it gives them the idea that they deserve to control our world. They think that they know better. When they are simply children, nobodies in our world."

A strange mood took over me as I said those words and it had the desired impact. Pansy sat up straighter, holding herself with pride as I reminded her of the true cause. I could see her father in her, a man that I had fought next to but never talked to.

"I have to go to the bathroom, I will be right back."

I practically fled down the hall and shut the door behind me. My clothes were damp with sweat and I turned the tap on, letting the cold water pour over my wrists. For a second, I was back there. I felt nauseous as I realized that part of me – the part that the darkness held claim to – believed my words. The cause was singing to me, trying to draw its soldier back into the good fight.

What was I doing? Throwing myself back into work would cause more harm than good. How could I hate muggleborns when I was one? I was losing my mind. Maybe I should disappear. I still had a chance to get away without getting caught by the Ministry. Draco could handle the mission. Couldn't he? Then why did he talk to the Head Unspeakable? The anger I had been repressing all day started coming to the surface. He was such an idiot. I had left him a note. Draco knew me better than anyone, he should have known that I would need space. I knew that he had removed me from the wards, which is why I couldn't enter the house. I had been going over the problem all day and it was the only thing that made sense. But why?

Maybe Draco had turned.

It was a crazy idea. There was no way that he would switch sides. But these people were his childhood friends. At the ball, Draco had changed for a second and almost lost control. Who knew what had happened this past week?

I had been gone for too long. I flushed the toilet, washed my hands and tried my best to dry my clothes from my sweat. I made my way back to the sitting room and hoped that Pansy didn't notice how out of sorts I had been. Taking my seat, I offered her a small smile.

"Your words have given me much to think on. There is something that you can do for us but I will need to sleep on it," she said standing up. "We are meeting tomorrow and you can join us. Will the issues between you and Edward be a problem?"

I also stood. "No, of course not."

"Leaf! Lyra will be staying with us for the next few days. Make the appropriate arrangements."

With that, the brunette bit me goodnight. The house elf was as haughty its master and showed me to my temporary room. It wasn't until I was alone that I allowed myself to sag into the mattress.

Tonight had been a close call. My role in the mission had been salvaged but everything else was a mess. Draco had betrayed my confidence and there was the possibility that he had switched sides. The Head Unspeakable had ordered a manhunt and there was no telling what he would do when I was captured. But there was nothing that I could do about that. It was out of my control and all I could do was worry about my part of the mission. Once I stopped this group, I could think about my future and what that entailed.

Draco would be at the meeting tomorrow and I wasn't ready to face him.

* * *

**Monday, May 29, 2000, 8:00 am**

Whenever I thought of bad guys having a meeting, I always pictured it to be in some grim location late at night. A cavern with flickering torches or in the bowels of an ancient, forgotten castle. The image must be from the fairy tales my parents used to read me as a child. The good people were always white and perfect, the villains were dark and ugly. This dichotomy that we are taught from a young age was a lie. People were more complicated than that, not so easily sorted.

It was with great surprise that I followed Pansy into the building Draco and I broke into a few weeks ago. The office space looked different in the daylight with people going about their business. The hallways were filled with the sound of laughter, chatter, and the sound of opening and closing doors. My heart hammered in my chest as we walked past Theo's office. My hands were sweaty and I forced myself to listen to Pansy fill me in on the upcoming meeting.

A hush fell over the room when we entered the boardroom. I followed Pansy and took the seat next to her. Draco was sitting on the opposite side of the table, at the end of the room. I was acutely aware of him and I could tell he was staring at me, but I refused to look in his direction. Part of me wanted to confront him, to get to the bottom of whether or not he had turned. But, I knew that would yield no results. Draco was a great liar, trained by the Dark Lord himself.

"What is she doing here?" Theo asked.

Taking a deep breath, I straightened myself in my chair. "You can direct your questions to me. I am here, after all, and I was welcomed into the group."

"As a formality."

I opened my mouth to retort but Blaise held up his hand. "You are right. Lyra, we are discussing the final preparations for the attack. You will be filled in on the details later. Edward, how is the potion coming along?"

"I had trouble procuring one of the ingredients, but I recently found a seller. It should be finished the night before the game," he said.

I made the mistake of glancing at Draco while he talked and his blue eyes met mine. I wasn't prepared. I didn't realize how much I missed him. He was so close but felt so far away. How many times had we fought on the same side, then fought each other? I couldn't read the look on his face and I wanted answers. Why did he go to the Ministry? Could he really be the mole?

To be honest, I barely knew the real Draco Malfoy. My history was with a brainwashed Draco. I pulled my gaze away from him and looked at Blaise.

"Good. Do you remember where to stash them?" Theo turned to Rosier.

"I'm not an idiot," Rosier said.

Blaise turned to Pansy. "Did you send out the invitations?"

"Yes. Everyone will be in attendance. The game starts at two and the detonation will happen at two thirty."

"And what is my wife's role?"

I shivered at the way the word sounded coming from Draco. There was a hint of anger and confusion when he asked that question and I wanted to smirk. _You wanted me out but here I am._

"She is going to create the detonation spell," Pansy said.

" _What?_ " Theo and I said at the same time.

Nothing seemed to faze Blaise. "Why?"

"If you haven't noticed her ability with spells, then you are blind. If anyone can pull this off, it's her."

"I thought Rosier was to detonate the potions?" Theo asked.

"That will be our backup plan if Lyra doesn't pull through."

Blaise nodded. "Okay. Edward, get her up to speed once we're finished here."

The meeting lasted ten more minutes. They discussed finer aspects of the plan and I tuned them out. What was Pansy playing at? When had she seen me perform spells? I didn't want to think of the damage this group could do if they got their hands on such a spell. I was both relieved and disappointed when Blaise adjourned the meeting. Draco got up and started walking towards me. I refused to look at him until everyone left the room. I wasn't sure how safe I would be. He could call the Ministry before I had a chance to leave. I hoped that he wouldn't. When the door slammed shut, I turned around so that we were face to face.

"Lyra, I was surprised to see you today," Draco said.

I rolled my eyes. "I am part of the group. Pansy got me up to speed."

"Didn't you get my messages? I was worried about your mother's sudden decline in health."

"The owls must have gotten lost. She's fine now. In fact, I'd say that she's better than ever."

He grabbed my elbow and I jerked my arm away as soon as I felt the sensation of apparition. Draco frowned and took a step back. He waved his wand around the room checking for any trace that someone was listening. My own wand swept the room and I knew we were in the clear. I put up some of my own privacy wards just to be safe.

"You're back? Just like that?" he asked after I didn't say anything.

"I told you that I needed time."

"You said you were coming back."

I took a step towards him and I prodded his chest. "What did you expect me to do? I needed time to process everything. Why did you rat me out to the Ministry?"

"I gave you two days to return but when you didn't, I thought you were taken. It was my duty to report your absence."

"Tell yourself that if it makes you feel better. How did you think I was going to react after getting my memories back? Do you not remember what I was like after I found out that I was a mudblood?"

" _Don't call yourself that._ If you had told me, I would have helped you," Draco said. "It hurts that you still don't trust me now that you remember everything."

His words affected me more than I thought they would. I was tempted to stop fighting and to tell him everything. It would be nice to be able to finally be completely honest with someone, to share the struggle I was still experiencing. I opened my mouth, then paused.

"How can I trust you? You left me when I needed you the most. And even now, we had an opportunity to start fresh and you ratted me out to the Ministry. How am I supposed to trust you after that? Do you know what our boss will do to me when they get ahold of me?"

Draco chuckled. "Go ahead and make it all about yourself like you usually do. You're great at that. You never think about what anyone else is going through or try to understand. Fine, if that's the way that you want to play it."

I saw him grab something from his pocket and I cursed.

"You have thirty seconds to leave before Unspeakables come flooding in," he said.

"Fuck you too."

"If you come back to the house, I will turn you in."

I pulled out my wand. "You're an asshole."

As soon as I started disapparating, I could hear my colleagues bursting into the conference room. I landed in my safe house but I couldn't stand still, so I started to pace. I didn't understand Draco. He claimed that he used to love me but his behavior didn't show that. It still bothered me that he didn't help me after the war. And like I told him, he still wasn't helping me now that I regained my memories. Draco was making it more difficult for me by telling the Ministry. Part of me understood why he did it, but the other part of me didn't trust him. How could I?

When I was finally able to sit down, I decided to stay the night at the safe house. I sent Pansy an owl telling her that I was pursuing a researching lead for the detonation spell and that I would return to her house soon. I also included that Edward and I fought and that he withheld the information that Blaise had asked him to share.

I was too exhausted to do anything else and I decided to call it an early night.

* * *

**Thursday, June 1, 2000, 10:00 pm**

Ever since Pansy answered my owl, something didn't sit right with me. If the potion information was right, Draco had overproduced the quantity of potion that we needed. With the size of the Quidditch pitch and the people in attendance, we only needed a quarter of what he produced. I rechecked the calculations three times to make sure. What was I missing? Pansy, Blaise, and Theo had something else planned but what?

I started looking into finding the decryption stone with greater urgency. I sent a letter to contacts that I only now remembered and only one of them answered. It was a man that I didn't trust but it was the only lead that I had. We set up a meeting that I was now on my way to.

Knockturn Alley was a familiar friend with the return of my memories as I made my way through its twists and turns. It was strange to see it so empty. The Ministry had tried to clean it up in recent years and shut down the Black Market. The businesses looked more legitimate but the Dark Arts and cursed objects were there if you knew where to look.

I pulled my hood over my head. It wouldn't do any good if anyone saw Hermione Granger in Knockturn Alley. No one would be surprised, but I didn't want the hassle or the negative publicity. The streets were empty and I couldn't shake the bad feeling that I had tonight.

Before I could second-guess myself, I knocked on the door. It took several minutes before I heard footsteps approaching and the door opened an inch. Gary Summers poked his head out.

"Rotten eggs."

"Come in," my contact said and opened the door all the way.

I followed him down the dark hallway and kept a good grip on my wand. I could hear water leaking somewhere. The air had the faint smell of mold, smoke, and copper.

"How long are you in town for?" he asked.

"Just the evening."

Gary led me into a room and started rummaging through cupboards, opening overfilled drawers, and slamming them shut. Dirty dishes littered every surface, the garbage can was overflowing. This place was disgusting. My anxiety urging me to leave was growing stronger by the minute. I almost excused myself when he held up a stone triumphantly.

"Here it is. You will pay the amount that we discussed?" he said.

I took it, holding it between my thumb and forefinger. It was a lot smaller than I expected it to be. I performed several tests to authenticate it and tried to contain the excitement that I felt. After months of searching, I had finally found it. It was a lot smaller than I expected it to be.

"No, you are asking for too much."

"Do you know how rare this stone is? I have another buyer that is willing to spend double the amount that you and I agreed on."

I looked up at him. "Then why would you give it to me?"

He pulled out his wand and before I could retaliate, ropes wrapped around my body. I could reach my wand and I tried to make it to the door but ended up falling over in the process. I'm embarrassed to admit how much I struggled against the restraints, trying to escape. I should have listened to my instincts! Gary grinned as he watched me fight, then clapped with delight when I finally gave up.

"I forgot how amusing you are!" he said with a giggle.

"Release me now."

"Did you know that there is a bounty on your head? I told the Ministry that you were coming and someone should arrive soon to pick you up."

I wanted to smack myself for my stupidity. I hadn't realized that the Head Unspeakable put a bounty on my head. Were they looking for Hermione Granger or Lyra Harrington? Or both? This information did not bode well for me. If the Unspeakables decided to make it a Ministry-wide search and reveal it to the public… First thing was first. I had to escape. But how?"

"How will you hear the Ministry workers when they arrive?" I was pissed off and irritable.

"The same way that I always do," he said. Gary pointed his wand and floated me to a wooden chair. The chair was so old that splinters were already digging into my skin as he restrained me a second time to the chair. "Stay out of trouble. I really need this money."

I spat at him and he laughed his way out of the room. I tried moving but the rope was wrapped so tightly that my arms and fingers were going numb. Unfortunately, I couldn't find a sharp enough edge on the chair to help me break the ropes.

I waited until I was sure that Gary was out of earshot before resorting to Plan B. I was hoping it wouldn't come to this. Taking a deep breath in, I started rocking myself until I gained enough momentum to jump up and land on my feet. Once I caught my breath, I bit my lip and leaned forward as much as I could. After counting to three, I threw myself back and landed on the floor with a loud crash. I howled in pain when I felt a piece of wood pierce my leg but I ignored it.

I had to escape. The fall had loosened the ropes that were still wrapped around my body, enabling me to grab my wand and free myself. I tried to apparate and cursed when I realized he had anti-apparition wards. Footsteps echoed down the hallway and I barely had time to cast a disillusion spell before Gary returned.

"Where did she go?"

"You were the one that captured her," Harry looked around the room, scrunching his nose.

I didn't recognize his partner. He had a scar that ran down his left cheek and there was something about him that I immediately disliked. Harry glanced at the trail of blood on the floor and I saw his eyes widen when he looked in my direction. There was a lot of blood, too much. I felt faint but I tried to focus on Harry. He joined his partner in inspecting the room, then stood in front of me with his foot covering the puddle of blood when they reached the area that I was hiding in.

"She escaped if she was even here at all," Harry said. "Let's go, Conrad."

"I promise that she was here!"

Conrad looked around the room one last time. "You're right, Potter. Come with us Mr. Summers. We need to ask you some questions."

Harry followed them out of the room his hands behind his back before flashing the number five. It meant to wait five minutes before leaving. As soon as their footsteps disappeared, I grabbed a towel, quickly scourgified it, grabbed the piece of wood still shoved in my leg and tied it around the wound.

As soon as the five minutes was up, I limped my way out to the front door making sure that the stone was in my pocket. As soon as the fresh night air hit me, I apparated to my safe house. The wound was bad. The last thing I remember was sending a Patronus to Draco before everything went dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I definitely didn't plan to go this long without updating. Thank you for your patience and for continuing to follow this story. Little update: I wrote a Draco/Hermione short story that I'm editing now and I am working on the Runaway Princess sequel, so stay tuned for that. Camp NaNo started so good luck to everyone who's doing that this April! 
> 
> Thank you again, lovely readers, and please let me know what you think! :)


	9. Chapter 9

**Friday, June 2, 2000, 2:00 am**

My leg was burning, the pain so unbearable that I had to bite down and swallow a scream. My eyes flew open at the agony and I swung my arms out trying to find the reason my leg felt like it was on fire. A strong arm pushed me back down onto something soft and it wasn't until I stopped struggling that I heard that the culprit was speaking.

"Hermione. It's me. Draco. You wounded your leg. I know this is painful but you didn't have much time left."

I rolled my eyes at his use of the word _wounded_ , his wealthy upbringing always came out in times of stress. His presence relaxed me and I tried to remember what had happened, clenching my jaw against the pain. I had gone to see Gary… and he betrayed me. It had been a close call, the only reason that I was not in Ministry custody was because of Harry. I really needed to talk to him, especially with how I left things with Harry before my little self-exploration retreat. He was a good friend and his intentions had been good.

But wait, hadn't Draco sworn that he would turn me over to the Ministry? I was at his mercy, so why didn't he do it? I watched his brow furrow in concentration as he worked on my leg. The burning stopped, a coolness spreading over the wound. It was a welcome relief until it got colder, then colder, and I thought my leg was going to turn to ice. It was a new kind of pain and I clenched the couch cushion underneath me, my knuckles white.

Why did I reach out to Draco? Our last encounter had made it clear where we stood with each other. Our past had been meaningless to him if he was so willing to turn me over to the Unspeakables. It still hurt that after everything we had been through, Draco had left me to figure things out on my own. But, that was the crux of it. We had been to hell and back again and I knew he would come if I called. And I knew he would be able to help me. How many times had we healed each other after seeing the Dark Lord? Or after close calls during missions? As I watched him work on my leg, I realized that this connection we had, this thing that bound us together, was still there, just buried under our own personal demons and awful coping mechanisms.

"Done. Your leg is almost as good as new," Draco said.

He took a step back and wiped his bloody hands on a towel. I missed his close proximity and wanted to ask him to stay. But I knew he would say no, so I pushed myself into a sitting position and inspected his work. There was a silver scar about ten centimeters long on the inside of my leg. I realized that my wrists were sore and I pushed up my sleeves to see where the rope bit into my skin. A little bit of salve and I would be as good as new.

"Who did this to you?" He grabbed my arms so that he could take a closer look. There was something dangerous in his tone, something that I hadn't heard in a very long time.

I pulled my arms away. "It's fine. I handled it."

"Handled it? You almost died. If you hadn't sent for me when you did, you would have bled out on the floor. I thought you were smarter than this."

"Well I was left with little choice when you turned your back on me," I said.

He scoffed. "You always twist everything I say so that it fits into a nice little sob story."

I stood up and started pacing. My body was sore but my thoughts were racing. This was the problem with being around Draco. I missed him but he was always just out of reach. He had been my light in the darkness, a guide when I was lost. He was my touchstone and I needed to ground myself. And I also just missed being around him. The way that he used to tease me, the way he had taught me, the best friend and love all wrapped in one.

"Why are things between us always so difficult? I miss you. We have been pulled apart so many times, but we're finally together again. And what do we do? We fight all the time," I said, pushing my hair out of my face. "I miss you and I'm so sick of fighting with you. You're all that I have left and I don't want to lose you too."

Draco sat down on the couch, avoiding the blood stains. Several times it looked like he was going to say something, but he didn't. I was so tired of this disconnection. I walked over to him and sat on my knees, ignoring the pain, and tilted his head so that I could look at him.

"Please, talk to me."

"I don't know what to do. I don't know how to get back to where we were or to be the person you want me to be," he said. There was something raw in his voice and I knew that we were finally talking, being real with each other.

"I don't want you to be that person. I don't know how to go back. I don't think we can," I said. His skin had always been so soft. He still had that little scar on his jawline from one of our spars. How many scars had we inflicted on each other, physical and non-physical? "But we can move forward. Take it day by day and get to know each other again."

He grabbed my face with his hands and looked at me like he was memorizing every detail. "I told our boss because I thought you were taken. I didn't think he would react the way he did. They know there's a mole and they think it's you. I'm sorry that I believed them."

"I'm sorry that I also thought you were the mole. What do we do now?"

"We figure out what's in those blueprints and documents. That's the key to everything," Draco said.

I pulled out the stone from my pocket. Thankfully I hadn't lost it in transit. "And then we can finally end this."

"Where did you get this?" Understanding dawned on his face. "You should have come to me for help."

"I am now."

I let go of his cheek and went to stand up. I was surprised when he gently pulled me back down. Before I could ask him what he was doing, he kissed me. I wish I could tell you that it was like one of those kisses from the movies, but I was caught unaware and my mouth was slightly open and it was awkward. Before I could get self-conscious, I pulled away slightly. His grey eyes were focused on me and I leaned in and kissed him again. We were both ready for it this time and I felt myself almost sag into him with relief. Draco felt like home and for the first time, I felt like I belonged somewhere. He wrapped his arms around me and hoisted me up onto his lap. Draco was both familiar and strange to me. I don't know how long we spent on that couch, wrapped up in each other, but I gently placed a hand on his chest when he tried to take it further.

"I want to, trust me, but I think we should take this slow," I said, playing with the hem of his shirt. "I don't want to fuck this up."

He kissed the top of my head. "I want this to work too. What do you say that we go and figure out what those damn documents contain?"

I wasn't ready to let him go, not when we finally reconnected. I had this fear that Draco would be snatched away from me again because we had found each other. Maybe that was why he kept his space after the war. It would be easy to listen to that little voice that told me that I didn't deserve this, that I had done too many unforgivable things to deserve even a sliver of happiness. And maybe I didn't deserve it, but I didn't care.

He was home.

* * *

**Monday, June 5, 2000, 3:00 pm**

It took some coordinating before Draco and I was able to meet again. The documents and blueprints were at Edward and Lyra's house, which was being monitored by the Ministry in case I was stupid enough to return. We decided to wait a couple of days to avoid suspicion. It would also give me time to touch base with Pansy and give her an update on my progress. Now that I had proven that I was worthy of their trust, I needed to ensure that they didn't doubt me.

At first, I was researching the detonation spell for appearance's sake. I needed to have a plausible excuse to give them when I told them that I couldn't do it. To create a spell like that, the only way I could think to do it would be to create a binding between each potion, linking them together. That way, you could have them all explode at the same time.

Once I realized that, I had an idea and started a true investigation. What if I could stop the potions from exploding instead? It was an idea that I would have to run by Draco. He knew the ingredients best. I could tell Pansy that I failed to make the spell work and when it came time for them to detonate... I would need to neutralize the potion because Rosier would still set them off. I could use the 'detonation' spell to neutralize the potion before he had a chance to activate them. That way, it wouldn't be able to explode, the binding spell would have rendered the potions useless.

I would need to explore this idea further and test it before the big day. Hundreds of lives were at stake.

* * *

**Wednesday, June 14, 2000, 8:00 pm**

Triple checking that my safe house was spotless, I waited for Draco in the kitchen. Initially, I was standing right beside the fireplace before realizing how creepy that was. Then, I chose to sit on my new couch – the blood never fully came out of the suede – and figured that looked desperate. I couldn't remember the last time I was this nervous to meet someone. I even had to change my shirt because I was sweating so much. After changing my position several times, I settled on the kitchen. I could drink my tea, pace to my heart's content and be notified of his arrival when he was here.

I felt the wards shift and I quickly fixed my hair – when did I become such a girl? – before stepping into the living room. Draco was brushing off soot from his clothes and when he looked up at me, I felt like a teenager again.

"Hey."

I wanted to smack myself. Hey? There were a million other things I could have said. How many times had I approached men undercover? I knew the words to say and the best I could come up with was 'Hey'?

"Do you have the stone?" he said walking towards the kitchen, barely glancing at me.

"Of course I do. Where else would it be?"

Draco started placing the documents and unrolling the blueprints on the table. I went to grab my mug. I tried to ignore the sting of hurt I felt. Had that night meant nothing to him? I poured him a tea and returned to the table, trying to focus on the task at hand. I couldn't believe how much trouble these encrypted papers were. The whole future of the operation hinged on this. I handed him the mug and pulled out the stone. I set it on the table.

"Are you ready?" he asked.

I laughed, but it sounded hollow even to my own ears. "Not one bit. You can do the honors this time."

Draco wrapped his arm around my waist and kissed the top of my head before grabbing the stone. I realized how foolish I had been when he first came in. It was crazy how a simple gesture could remove all doubt and I leaned into him, my head resting on his torso as I watched him activate the decryption stone. This is what we had been waiting for. I had bled for this.

The documents and blueprints glowed gold. The light was so bright that I couldn't look directly at the papers. Draco pulled me in tighter and we returned our attention to the table when the light dimmed, then disappeared completely. As soon as we started reading the words on the documents, we released each other and started grabbing the papers and plans with both of our hands, our eyes scanning the pages. When I was done, I looked up at Draco and I could feel the blood draining from my face. He dropped the papers in his hands and I watched them flutter back onto the table.

"What are we going to do?"

Draco swore. "These idiots are going to start another war."

I pinched myself, hoping that this was a dream that I would wake up from. I understood why they wanted Draco to make such an obscene amount of explosive potion. They were going to bomb the Quidditch Pitch, the Ministry of Magic, St. Mungo's, and Diagon Alley.

All the pieces had fallen into place but neither of us was prepared for the result.

We were screwed.


	10. Chapter 10

**Saturday, June 17, 2000, 8:00 pm**

I carefully set down my quill trying to stop my fingers from trembling. Picking up the parchment, I scanned it for the hundredth time. The doubts were creeping in. Had I made a mistake? Overlooked something? No, I had revised my notes three times. There was only one way to know if I had done it. Hobbling to the other side of the room, I waved my wand.

" _Prohibere praemium_."

The purple liquid bubbled and expanded with my words until suddenly, it stopped. The glass cracked and at the influx of air, the potion disappeared. After days of toying with the spell, I had done it.

Finally.

Running out of the room, I found Draco hunched over a desk. He was busy writing something, his brow furrowed in concentration. His silver eyes glanced up at my entrance and before I could help it, I launched myself at him. Draco easily caught me, but I could see the question in his eyes.

"I was successful."

"That means –"

I nodded. "We can save them."

* * *

 

**Monday, June 19, 2000, 10:00 am**

"Why am I here? Harry asked, suspiciously looking between Draco and me. "I thought that you were determined to bring Hermione in. And last I saw, you were wounded."

"It's a long story and I only have time to give you the short version," I explained. "We need your help. Essentially, Draco and I are undercover with a group of terrorists. They want to create enough terror that they can take advantage of the following shock and impose changes. Essentially, toss out muggleborns from the wizarding world."

Draco took over. "Their plan is to set explosive potions at several high target locations and to detonate them Wednesday at two thirty in the afternoon."

"Why are you telling me this? I am not cleared for this information," Harry asked.

"Because the Head Unspeakable still thinks that I have gone rogue. I can't be taken into the Ministry, especially not with this mission ongoing," I explained. "No one has seen the last Unspeakable that was suspected of going rogue."

Understanding dawned on his face. "Alright, what do you need me to do?"

"We can't do this alone. Hermione managed to create a spell that will neutralize the potions. There are two things that could happen. One, the potion is neutralized and one of the radicals will come to investigate. Two, the spell doesn't work and a radical will come to detonate the potion," Draco said, pulling out a map. "These are the places they plan on hitting. We're going to need everyone on this."

Harry looked over the map, the blueprints, the information on the potion, and my spell. Once he was finished, he sat back in his chair. "Who is involved in this group?"

"That's something that we can't divulge at this point. We still don't know who the leader is and our positions within the group are shaky at best," I said. "We still don't know who the mole is in our department."

"Hermione and I will be at the Ministry. There's something in the language they use and things that they have brought up that makes me think that this is their actual target," the blond said, pointing at the location.

"Okay. How certain are we that the spell will work?"

I rolled my eyes. "It's going to work. I triple checked the theory and then tested it out on a couple of batches. Have your people learn it just in case. The group thinks that the spell will detonate the potion and I don't know who will have the honor of performing it."

"The only other way to detonate the potions is for someone to manually do so, which is why we need the aurors there."

Harry nodded. "Okay. I'll say that I got an anonymous tip. Thank you for bringing this to me. I won't let you down."

"We won't either."

Once Harry left with a copy of everything, Draco joined me on the couch. He slung an arm over my shoulders. My first instinct was still to pull away, but that was happening less and less. I rested my head against his chest and contented myself to listen to his heartbeat. It was strong and steady. I didn't know what would happen after this was all over. Like we told Harry, neither of us knew who was truly in charge of this operation. If they slipped through our fingers, then the leader would return with a stronger, better plan. But if we captured the key figures in this organization, the mission would be complete.

For the first time, I felt like I had a future and I knew that it was because of Draco. With our history and the things we had endured, I knew that he was the only one for me. Draco was my anchor, the light in the never-ending darkness. Did I want to continue being an Unspeakable? Part of me did. I was one of the best and the job was thrilling. Pretending to be someone else, to help the world without anyone being the wiser, and the adrenaline rush involved was addicting. What else would I do? The things I had wanted to do back at Hogwarts no longer appealed to me.

"I hope we did the right thing by bringing Harry into this," Draco said, breaking the silence.

"What's done is done. It has the highest success rate," I said before turning to look at him. "When you think of the future, what does it look like to you?"

He readjusted me so that I was sitting on his lap. "I don't know. When I was younger, it was to take over the family business and find a nice pureblood wife. But now, I like being an Unspeakable. I think this is it for me."

"What about a family?"

"I don't want kids. I want my family's curse to end with me. I would never want to burden a child with my last name."

My fingers traced his jawline as I thought about his words. "They wouldn't need to have your name. There are parts of the world that the name Malfoy doesn't mean anything."

"Do you want kids?"

"I can't have them, the Dark Lord made sure of that," I said dropping my hand onto his shoulder. "Even if I could, I don't think I would either. I also like being an Unspeakable and what kind of life would that mean for a family?"

He rested his forehead on mine. "I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault. The Dark Lord did it."

"I mean I'm sorry for everything. You were right. I should have been there for you after the war. I should have tried harder to get you out of there. I knew what you were going through and I could have fought harder. Not a day that goes by that I don't regret what I did."

I kissed him, softly. "You're here now and that's enough."

"But –"

"This wouldn't have worked between us after the war. I needed to figure things out on my own, deal with my emotions. Most importantly, I needed to remember and my mind wasn't ready for that," I explained. "I was mad at you because you were an easy target. I needed to get mad at someone and the Dark Lord was dead. But He did this, not you."

Draco opened his mouth to say something but an owl pecked at the window. I recognized the bird and reluctantly got up. "That's Pansy's owl."

I grabbed the letter and watched it fly away without a treat. Reluctantly, I opened it and scanned the contents before handing it to Draco. He read it then handed it back to me.

"Let's end this thing."

* * *

**Tuesday, June 20, 2000, 7:00 pm**

The room was rife with tension. I didn't know why we were gathered here. We had already gone through the plan for tomorrow. There was nothing left to talk about unless something changed. An alteration this late in the game did not bode well for us. I resisted the urge to glance at Draco and kept my gaze level. Theo paced in front of the group, while Pansy stood off to the side. Her sapphire eyes were watching us closely like she was searching us for something. Only Blaise looked relaxed.

"Are you going to tell me why we're here? I didn't sign up to be summoned like a house elf," Leonard Rosier said breaking the silence.

Theo ignored him. "Lyra, were you successful with the spell?"

"I was. Who should I give the information to?"

"You can walk me through it after the meeting. There have been changes to our plan," he said, stating the obvious. "You're going to perform the spell and Edward will detonate the potion if you're unsuccessful."

Pansy stepped forward. "She won't be."

"What about me?" Leonard asked.

"You're no longer needed. Edward created the potion and Lyra is in charge of the spell. It makes more sense," Blaise said. "I'm sure that you understand."

"What about what I was promised?" he asked.

Pansy rolled her eyes. "You'll still receive it."

I knew that there was something that Draco and I were missing. This group was always one step ahead of us. My hand found its way to Draco's. We needed to come up with a new plan and tell Harry about the changes. We were now at the center of everything.

I didn't have a good feeling about this.

Wednesday, June 21, 2000, 1:30 pm

"Are you ready?" Draco asked when I walked into the kitchenette.

He had moved into my safe house after we decrypted the plans. It was easier to work together in close proximity and it gave us the opportunity to explore our relationship. We were finally in a good place and that scared me. Things always went south for us when we've reached this point in the past. Plus, the Head Unspeakable would now be hunting him down too because of his association with me. It was easy to forget that I was a wanted person with the issues we were dealing with lately.

"No. I don't like it that they separated us."

He set down his tea. "You're overthinking it. We're Edward and Lyra and despite some of the mistakes we have made, they have accepted us."

"Not enough for us to know their leader," I said.

Draco walked towards me and took me in his arms. He pushed the strand of blonde hair behind my ear and I leaned into the comfort that he provided. I knew that he was right. There was no reason to think that the new Death Eaters knew about our subterfuge, but there was something that I just couldn't put my finger on.

"We told Harry about the changes. We both have the charmed galleons in case something happens. That's all we can do," Draco said.

"I know. You're right," I said with a terse smile. "It's just the nerves. Are you ready to go?"

He nodded. I closed my eyes and was about to apparate when he kissed me. I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him closer, trying to remember every detail about him. It felt like we were saying goodbye. We had been pushed together and torn apart again and again. It felt like we were doomed to repeat this cycle even though logically I knew that the Dark Lord was dead. We wouldn't be forced to forget. He was gone and tonight, Draco and I would return to each other unharmed.

"I love you."

"I love you too. Please come back to me," I said.

We apparated to our required stations and the feeling that we should have stayed home today didn't leave me.

* * *

**Wednesday, June 21, 2000, 2:15 pm**

There were more people than I expected when my feet touched down. The headquarters was in an abandoned house close to the quidditch pitch. After we saw their plan, we realized that this house was centrally located for all the attacks. The Fidelius Charm kept us from divulging the information to Harry. Originally, I was supposed to oversee the person performing my spell and then assist Pansy as needed. She was still the only one that believed in my magical skill and I had a feeling she was the one that was behind the change in plans. They filled Draco and me in on the simultaneous attacks, something that we already knew from their plans.

"You're late," Pansy said when she caught sight of me.

I walked towards her. "I'm surprised to see so many people."

"They're not important in the overall scheme. Just extra hands to help us today," she said as she led me to the backyard.

"What if muggles see me?"

Pansy rolled her eyes. "They're going to have a lot more to worry about shortly."

My hands were sweating as I pulled out my wand. I had practiced a million times and I knew that the spell either would or wouldn't work. I had made certain that it wouldn't accidentally detonate the potion but the fear still lingered. When Pansy gave me the signal, I closed my eyes and did the complex wand movements. "Prohibere praemium."

I opened my eyes. The witch's sapphire eyes were watching me carefully. She opened her mouth to say something but a cellphone ringing interrupted us. I looked around to see the source and I was confused when I saw Pansy pull it out of her pocket and answer it. Someone was talking to her but I was too far away to hear what was being said.

"I see," Pansy said before hanging it up a few minutes later. "I'm disappointed in you, Hermione."

Before I could react, ropes wrapped around my body. I tried fighting against them, reaching for the knife I had started carrying around in my pocket since Gary betrayed me, but before I could grab it, I was stunned.

* * *

It took me a couple of seconds to place where I was when I finally regained consciousness. Blinking away the tiredness, I saw that I being kept in some kind of basement. I was no longer at the abandoned house. It looked like I was in an old, large building and that this area hadn't been touched in decades. A thick layer of dust covered every surface. This room was full of broken desks, chairs, and bookshelves.

"You're finally awake," Pansy said. She was smiling, but there was something sinister about it. She reminded me of Bellatrix in that moment and I wondered if there was a family connection there. It was a silly question. All the families were related in some way.

"Let me go."

She snorted. "Unlikely. You were supposed to detonate those potions, Hermione."

"I don't know what you're talking about. Who's Hermione?"

"Don't give me that. I don't know how to reverse you back to your true appearance, but I know it's you."

A loud crack echoed and I realized that we were in some kind of tunnel. I would recognize that voice anywhere and the bad feeling I had this morning returned with a vengeance.

"Release me at once," Draco said, his voice leaving no room for argument.

"Draco, how nice of you to join us," Pansy said.

His blue eyes met mine and I felt calm. After all this time – with my memories intact – it only took a look for us to communicate in these situations. I knew he wouldn't confirm or deny our identities, which would give us an edge. This mission was turning out to be more trouble than I expected. The ropes fell away from me and I looked at Pansy, confused. She didn't say anything and led us through the tunnels until we reached a door.

Pansy turned the handle and opened the door. My heart was racing, I tried to turn back but Blaise grabbed me. Draco was held back so he couldn't see what was in the room, but my fear was enough for him to know that it was bad.

"Bring her in."

I flailed, tried kicking Blaise, but nothing I would do freed me from him. "No. I'm not going in there. You can't do this to me. You don't know how."

"Do you remember who conducted the tests on you?" Pansy asked with a smile and understanding dawned on me. "My parents would never talk about the war, but they left extensive entries on their experiments."

"Pansy, what are you doing?" Draco asked. "This isn't like you."

She scoffed. "What would you know about me? Did you know that we all joined the Death Eaters? The entire time we were told that we weren't good enough. We were always compared to you and the mudblood."

"Trust me, it was no treat to take orders from the Dark Lord," I said. "This whole enterprise of yours is stupid. I worked with all of your parents and they would be disappointed that their heirs turned out to be such idiots."

I didn't know how they had found out about our identities or what their plans were because I was ushered into the room. I could hear Theo push Draco into after me and his sharp intake of breath when he saw the familiar equipment. I stopped fighting. What was the point? Draco and I were overpowered, we were stuck in some random basement, and I would not show them my fear.

"Take me instead," Draco said. "What use do you have for someone like her?"

Blaise pushed me towards the chair in the middle of the room. I looked around for the equipment that was usually present during each of my sessions but couldn't see some of the vital pieces. Pansy took out her wand and placed it on my temple. I could hear Draco doing something but I couldn't take my eyes away from the raven-haired witch.

"My parents found a way to recalibrate you without the mess of the muggle implements they used. The war ended before they were able to use it. I brought you to this room more for effect than anything," Pansy said with a shrug. "You ruined our plan, so you're going to help set it right again."

" _Animo imperium_."

I surveyed the room, trying to ignore the tingling at the back of my head. I couldn't remember how I came to this place but I found that I didn't care about such a trivial thing. It was a stone building that looked like it would collapse at any moment. Only magic was keeping it intact, a sloppy repair job. There were four other people in the room. The man with brown hair and blue eyes caught my attention first. He was staring at me like I had dealt him a crushing blow. There was something familiar about him, but I couldn't put my finger on it. The two other guys were insignificant. It was clear that the woman standing next to me was in charge.

"I am at your command."

* * *

"Why do we have to stay? The potions have been deactivated and we've been waiting for ages. No one is coming to check on them," a voice said.

"Someone will come and we need to catch the people responsible. Now unless you know the identities of those responsible and have proof, then shut it."

We were taking the long way around. I didn't know what we were doing but I knew it involved the potion in my hands. It was rather pretty with its purple swirls and the way it sparkled when the light hit it just so. I had been carrying it around since I first woke up in that room. It was strange, as soon as I held it, the guy with the brown hair – his name was Draco apparently – stopped protesting. He also changed his appearance so that he had the brightest blond hair that I had ever seen. If he was trying to have a realistic disguise, he really should have changed his hair to a darker blond. He changed my appearance as well but I couldn't see what I looked like now. All I knew about mine was that I had frizzy brown hair.

"Who goes there? We've alerted the teams, the aurors will be here any minute," one of the men in the red robes said.

"Kill them," the leader commanded.

" _Avada kedavra_ ," I said, stepping forward. The bodies dropped to the ground and I turned back to the raven-haired witch, awaiting my next task.

"Pansy, what are you doing?" Theo asked.

"I needed proof that she will do whatever I ask her to. The blood is on her hands, not ours," she said. "We've gone too far to turn back now. We will either succeed or fail today."

Draco's face paled but that was the only visible sign that he was upset with the aurors' deaths. I turned my head back towards Pansy. The blond kept distracting me and I knew that distractions led to mistakes, which resulted in death. But her attention was focused on the two other men in the group.

"How will that potion work? Hermione rendered them all useless," Draco asked.

Theo sighed. "You didn't really think that we would trust your work after we found out your identities?"

"How did you find out?"

"Our man inside the Unspeakables told me. Once Hermione went missing, the Head Unspeakable was more concerned with catching her than preserving the mission's integrity," Theo said. "We didn't know you and Hermione's full history with the Death Eaters but we hoped that you would be swayed to our side."

I tried to follow the conversation but it was useless. I didn't know these people or what they were talking about. The air around us started to shift and I pulled out my wand, not caring that Pansy didn't order it. My first duty was to protect her and fight for her.

A group of wizards and witches appeared, wands drawn. The man with the raven-black hair and bright green eyes looked at both me and Draco. Did I know these people? They were wearing matching uniforms as the two men that I had killed. The group's attention was drawn to it and I saw grief, anger, and determination in their expression. The man with the scarred left cheek lifted his wand only to be stopped by the auror next to him.

"No Conrad! Do you want to kill us all?" the green-eyed man said.

Pansy laughed. "I should have expected Potter to come and save the day. You're too late. Hermione, if anyone tries to stop me, kill them."

The scarred man spat. "They killed two of our men already. You're blinded by your devotion to Granger and Malfoy."

"Did you see the potion in Hermione's hand? It's still active and Hermione's spell isn't working." the man named Potter said. "Draco, what did they do to her?"

"The same thing the Dark Lord did to her. Hermione's not in control," the blond said.

"Draco, we're not messing around. _Silencio_ ," Blaise said.

Pansy looked bored. "Hermione is going to take the potion to the main floor and detonate it. If you try to stop her, she will activate it here. Do you understand your orders, Hermione?"

"I do."

All I needed to do was heat the potion and it would explode. I was about to leave when I saw something shimmer at the edge of my vision. I whipped out my wand and deflected a curse. Suddenly spells coming from different directions, targeted at me, Draco, Pansy, Theo, and Blaise. My opponents had not yet revealed themselves and it took all my concentration to deflect their assault. While everyone was distracted by the attack, I saw that Draco somehow made his way beside me and was helping me, albeit wordlessly.

The group in the red robes looked uncertain as to what to do and watched the onslaught. Pansy, Theo, and Blaise were trying to reveal the attackers but I somehow knew that they would be unsuccessful. What was I doing here? I tried to shake off that question, but it was like a mosquito. Each time I dismissed it, the question came back stronger and more annoying than ever.

"Drop the potion," Draco said when the silencing spell wore off.

I wanted to look at him, but I had to focus on Pansy. The trio was being overpowered and I didn't know how to help. "Why? We'll all die."

"No, it'll render the potion inactive and save everyone."

His words gave me pause. It was clear at this point that we were going to lose. While I was tiring and Blaise was rendered unconscious, our invisible enemy showed no sign of fatigue. Pansy and Theo were minutes away from being overpowered.

"Do you trust me?" he asked.

I wanted to say no, but another answer escaped my lips. "Yes."

The curses were coming at us with greater speed and frequency as if our enemy had gotten reinforcements. The aurors had also finally decided to attack us. Before I could react, Draco pushed the potion out of my hand, the glass shattered upon contact with the floor, and I felt the sensation of side-along apparition. It didn't matter what I did, the Ministry disappeared before my eyes.

* * *

As soon as we landed, I pushed Draco away and raised my wand at him. My hand was shaking and it took every ounce of concentration to keep it pointed at him. He looked sad, but not surprised to find himself at my mercy. I tried to apparate back to Pansy but there were wards at the Ministry preventing me from doing so. I had failed my mission because of him and he had to pay. Yet no matter how hard I tried, my mouth refused to utter any curses. We were in some kind of forest, the only sound that I could hear were the birds chirping overhead and my labored breathing.

"I thought you were going to help me!"

For a moment, he looked older than his twenty years but it was gone before I could analyze it. "I am helping you, even though it might not seem like it."

"You ruined my mission!"

"That was never your mission. Think about it, why would you trust a complete stranger?"

My head started pounding. "I don't know."

"Because I'm not a stranger. You know me."

"You're lying," I said. " _Stupefy!_ "

He dodged it easily. I sent spell after spell but he deflected and dodged them all. My frustration and anger grew with each missed curse and the fact that he wasn't returning fire. Draco seemed to be enjoying himself, like this was a game to him and my fury grew until finally, I lunged at him. This took him by surprise and I managed to pin him down but before I could get a punch in, he flipped us over. We fought each other for dominance. It was frustrating because he was my match and I could not get the advantage. It finally ended when he pinned me to the ground and nothing I did freed me from his grasp.

"Listen to me, Hermione. That's all I ask. If you still want to leave at the end of my explanation, I won't stop you," Draco said.

I looked into his sad grey eyes and there was no sign of deception. I nodded but was frustrated when he didn't release his hold on me.

"Do you want the long version or short version?" he asked.

"Long."

Draco told me a story about a boy with green eyes and a lightning bolt scar, a redhead boy, and a girl with frizzy brown hair and a thirst for knowledge. He told me about the adventures that they went on, how they saved their school again and again from the Dark Lord and how the war began. Draco told me that the girl was captured during the war and tortured until she forgot her own name and how he was ordered to train her and how they fell for each other but were torn apart by the Dark Lord. How they both forgot and were paired together and were an unstoppable team and fell in love again. He told her that they found out the Dark Lord was lying to them and that they were going to defect to the Order. He told her everything up until the part where she woke up in the room this afternoon.

"Pansy used a spell on you and then you became a soldier once again," Draco said, finishing the story.

"Animo imperium," I said, my head feeling like it was going to split in two.

His whole face lit up. "You remember?"

I scrunched my face. Everything he told me felt familiar. I didn't remember it exactly. It was like there was a shadow where the memory was and each time I tried to grab onto it, the memory dissipated. It also made my headache a million times worse. I tried to explain it to him.

"We should bring you to St. Mungo's. Maybe a mind healer can reverse the effects of the spell," Draco said.

It sounded like a good idea, but my gut was screaming at me not to. The thought of having someone poke and prod in my head made me nauseous. "No. The Ministry will be looking for us and St. Mungo's will be the first place that they look. We can look into reversing the spell, but our first priority is to get away safely. What was our plan for after the mission?"

"Our plan was to move to Canada with new identities and to start over. Our aliases were from that country so we had to do extensive research for our mission. They were from the east coast, but you liked the sound of the west coast," he said.

"What about our lives here? Wouldn't we miss our family and friends?"

Draco was about to reach out and grab my hand but stopped himself. "Our lives were consumed by work and we weren't close to our friends anymore. The risk would be too high starting over here."

He got up and walked towards the underbrush. Draco pulled out two bags and gave one to me. "You were always prepared."

A twig snapped in the distance, followed by another one. Our pursuers had found us. Draco slung his bag over his shoulder and extended his hand to me. "Are you coming?"

The voices were getting louder and I knew that we were seconds away from being discovered. We had lingered here too long. A little voice inside my head told me to run away, but my instincts knew that I was safe with him. I could figure out the rest later.

I grabbed his hand without a second thought and we disappeared.


	11. Chapter 11

**Five Years Later…**

The ocean breeze brushing across my face was calming. My brown hair was tangled and kept blowing into my face but I didn't care. Canada had given me peace of mind, something that I had never expected. Draco and I found our home in Vancouver, a place that was filled with activity and creativity. There was a relaxed feel about it despite its busyness and the mountains were only hours away from us. It was quite different from London and it was a change that we both needed.

Our names had changed, but we were able to keep our appearances mostly the same. My hair was a darker brown and I had grown it out so that it no longer was a frizzy mess. Draco kept his hair short. He was always wearing one hat or another, hiding his distinguishable hair. Although the Canadian magical community knew about our war, they weren't obsessed with it like we were. It was the reason that Draco and I were able to live there without detection. After we left London, Harry tried to clear our names. He defended us against the Ministry, the Daily Prophet, and the public. It didn't matter. We were two ex-Death Eaters and no redemption story was going to sway them.

Pansy, Theo, and Blaise were arrested and given a lifetime sentence in Azkaban. I was relieved to hear that they were going to be put away and I hoped that no one else would be as foolish as they had been. The trio revealed the mole's name but it turned out to be a false identity. The traitor was meticulous and adept at covering his tracks. It still bothered me that he was out there working in the shadows undetected, but there was nothing that I could do about it.

After a long discussion, Draco and I decided to leave our occupation behind. It took a year to break Pansy's curse and there were still things that I couldn't remember. My childhood and early days at Hogwarts were a blur. I knew the feelings that I had, but the events that happened were vague. My parents were only a shadow of a memory. This was a result of having my memory altered too many times. My recovery had been long, but Draco had been at my side through it all.

"There you are. What are you thinking about?" he asked, wrapping his arms around me.

I relaxed into his embrace. "I was just thinking about our past. Did you know that this is our fifth anniversary since we arrived in Canada?"

"How could I forget? I feel like that's when my life truly began," Draco said. "Do you have any regrets?"

"None. Even if we were somehow able to return to London, I would stay here," I said, turning so that we were face-to-face. "You are my home."

His lips met mine and I melted into him. Even after all these years, I couldn't get enough of him. I made the best decision of my life that day in the forest. I didn't know Draco – at least I couldn't remember him – yet my soul knew what he meant to me even if my mind didn't.

"Let's go home, wife."

I knew I was wearing a stupid smile on my face. The woman that I had been after the war would never have believed that a life like this was possible. That Hermione would have run away from any sign of intimacy, connection, and trust. Back then, I thought that the darkness would swallow me whole, that there would be no way out. It was a long, brutal process, but I would never have become the person I was today without overcoming it.

That last mission had pushed me further than I thought I could go, but Draco was right. Our lives in London had to end, for them to truly begin.

**The End**

**Author's Note:**

> Wow, I can't believe I finished this story! This was an experiment both in style and first person POV. I'm working on another Draco/Hermione story right now. 
> 
> Thanks to all my friends for supporting me along the way. This wouldn't have been written without you guys xx


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